I miss you Barnard.

As a STEM major, registering for classes this semester was a breeze. However, my sense of calm took an unexpected turn as I prepared for the first day—a shocking realization dawned on me: I found myself enrolled in zero Barnard classes. I was disturbed. I was appalled. How could I go to Barnard and not be in any Barnard classes? After the first week of classes, I decided that I needed more Barnard energy. I hope that no Barnard students are in a similar situation, but if they are, this is how I have been surviving my Barnard withdrawal.

  1. Wait in line for Hewitt for 30 minutes. I don’t know what is happening with the ID scanner, but the more time I spend in line the better. I love soaking in the sights and smells of the tunnels.
  2. Smoke a cig in between classes outside the chastity gates.
  3. Argue with a CC man.
  4. Take cold showers. Nothing makes me more nostalgic for the Quad than waiting 15 minutes for my shower to warm up only to give up and just accept my freezing fate. Well also, 616 didn’t have hot water, so this was a bit out of my control.
  5.  Go braless.
  6. Wear jeans that are too long on me that inevitably will get soaked in the rain.
  7. Shave and dye my suitemate’s head.
  8. Watch the Barbie movie. Brag about Greta Gerwig being a Barnard alum.
  9. Question gender identity.
  10. Appreciate lesbianism.
  11. Eat a Diana burrito bowl. Proceed to get a tummy ache.
  12. Become a Marxist.
  13. Write a Bwog article.

Barnard via Bwog Staff