Last week, Bwog calculated exactly how much of his or her student life fees a Columbia student could drink back at Lerner Pubs. This week, Bwog has found another source of free items (and use for Frontiers) to take back a few more of those student life dollars.
B-of-the-E Assumptions (based on Google)
- There are about 180 days per year that every student will be on campus if he or she only leaves for Thanksgiving, winter break, and spring break.
- Let’s say those plastic rain ponchos are a fashion statement (ie: not just for rainy days).
- Several on campus locations, including Lerner Hall and the Hartley Hospitality Desk, stock plastic ponchos.
- New York City has an average of 121 rainy days per year.
- The wholesale price of rain ponchos is $50.79 for 48 ponchos.
- Student life fees are $698 per semester, which we’ll call $700
Science?
- Student life fees for 8 semesters = $700 x 8 = $5,600
- The average cost of a poncho= $50.79/48= $1.06, about $1
- The approximate percentage of one year that a student is on campus: 180/365 = about 50% of the time
- So, if there are 121 rainy days per year, we’re around for roughly 50% of those, or 60
- If you take one poncho for every rainy day over the course of four years= 240 ponchos (If a few friends are willing to give you their ponchos, that’s even more! But it also begs the question what you might do with all of them…).
- Dollar value in ponchos= 240x$1= $240
- Percent of student life fees returned= $240/$5,600= 4.3%
Conclusions
- A student can get back about 4%ish of his/her student life fees by taking one poncho every rainy day at Columbia.
- Ponchos are more valuable than beer
- Back-of-the-envelope calculations are a tested and proven method to procrastinate starting your problem set, ever.
People who know what’s up via Wikimedia Commons
15 Comments
@Anonymous what if I went to EVERY club meeting with free pizza. What if I joined every pre-professional society and went to all the conferences. What if I used every page of my printing quota
@Sasha I like this article, Roberta! Very funny :) Good choice on a rainy day, too. Maybe we should be hoarding fruit from the dining hall, too, to make up for the expensive meal plan!
@Anonymous i just wanted to mention again that i fucking hate the new layout of this site. ive officially switched to spec. fuck you guys for betraying me. i cant belieeve this shit.
@BWOG just call me judas
@Anonymous It wouldn’t be so bad if there was a way to get rid of the white background.
@Anonymous right? i remember loling when spectrum came out because it looked so fucking bland. this is even worse, and the more painful because i don’t want blandness from bwog, and i exspect it from spec
@Anonymous What if you used a free condom everytime?
@Anonymous And if you grab a free copy of The New York Times every time you walk through Lerner, you can earn back even more of your student life fees!
@Anonymous Are rainy days spread evenly throughout the year? Maybe there are more or fewer during the months we are here.
@Anonymous After spending the past two summers here, I think there are definitely more rainy days during the summer.
@Optional Reminded me my consulting internship too.
@Anonymous What other free stuff can be analyzed this way? The Prezbo fun run shirt? Free pizza from student groups? There was some free stuff at NSOP, I guess, but that had its own orientation fee.
@The Dark Hand How much of my student life could be saved if they would stop funneling money into the clutches of Spec?
@Ko Nice analysis. Reminds me of my internship at BCG.
@Please Post something worth reading.
Please.