Photo by ESN

Bwog’s Airborne Contaminants Team has finally confirmed, after days of close analysis, that the sign posted on the Wien bulletin board earlier this week does indeed contain the word “asbestos.” We’re all gonna die!

Well, maybe only those of us who like to hang out anywhere that smells of the good ol’ John Jay garbage chute. Though the sign says that floors 3-9 will be affected, close inspection of another sign (with much smaller print) reveals that construction on floors 3-8 will be limited to trash rooms, where some asbestos-laden pipe insulation will be replaced.

On floor 9, residents might be a little freaked by the plastic covering the carpet from the staircase to the south end of the hallway. The construction crew, which is set to start work tomorrow, will be removing “350 feet of vinyl asbestos tile” from rooms 938 and 940.

You may be coming home to a freshly “inspected” room,  but just think – it could be worse. Instead of stealing your alcohol, Columbia could have stolen your dearly loved asbestos tile floor. Never leave your valuables behind, kids.