Senior Wisdom: Michael Glendinning

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Smoulder, Mike, smoulder.

Accepted your fate for that final in an hour? Take some time to read our next Senior Wisdom, featuring Michael Glendinning!

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Michael Glendinning – Columbia College 2017, Neuroscience major.
I’m from New Providence, NJ.

Claim to fame: I was a lead activist for the CU Dems and was an organizer for Columbia Divest for Climate Justice! #divestnow. I also am a world champion dreamer.

Where are you going? I plan on living in NYC and working in a clinical research lab in my gap-years before med school. My friends and I are actually looking for somewhere to move in to after graduation. An affordable 4br apartment somewhere in Northern Manhattan would be convenient and awesome for us. Please let me know if you have any leads!

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2021?

1) If you are having any legal issues, related to the school or not, go to the Ombuds office!! It is the most underappreciated resource on campus when you’re in a jam, of any kind. They saved my rear end one time and I’ll be forever grateful. And they are super duper nice.

2) I’ve learned that people here in particular have this weird thing hating on New Jersey all the time! As a proud New Jersey native, I am pissed about it and want the facts cleared up on the Internet! Sure the NJ turnpike kind of sucks, and our state politics are sometimes embarrassing. But, only from a truly incredible cultural epicenter could American heroes like Ice-T, Bruce Springsteen, and Jon Bon Jovi have been born. We have, hands down, the greatest beach towns in the entire country, and the best diners too. Where would modern life be without the light bulb, the transistor, and the laser, all of which were invented in NJ! People from New Jersey are also the best looking people in the nation! Class of 2021’ers, if you know what is good for you, you will make a friend or two from The Garden State! You won’t regret it!

3) I’d like to share the H17 with no peppers on ciabatta (+ arugula sometimes) with the Class of 2021. It’s the best sandwich nearby.

“Back in my day…” Amigos’s Tuesday night bottomless quesadillas and margaritas special was only $20, and they gave you margaritas that weren’t watery, and they weren’t also randomly a bbq restaurant, and you could color on the tables with the little box of crayons they would give you, and they would let you take your last quesadilla home with you for lunch tomorrow. What gives!

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: I coined the phrase “hang loose!”

What was your favorite class at Columbia? Contemporary Islamic Civilization with Professor Hamid Dabashi! I don’t think Professor Dabashi teaches that course most years, but if you ever have a chance to take any class with him, take it!, for you will not find a more intelligent, insightful professor on this campus!

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? I really like both of those things. I would rather give up all the crazy barricades at Bacchanal.

One thing to do before graduating: Protest the university when it fucks up! Make an administrator raise their voice at you!

Any regrets? None at all. Hang loose!

Image via Michael Glendinning

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  1. desiring_mesaas  

    Dabashi? DABASHI?????? He is one of the worst professors the MESAAS dept has (which means Dabashi is an ok prof considering the dept is bomb). If Dabashi blew your mind, you should have taken classes with George Saliba, Wael Hallaq, Gil Anidjar, Timothy Mitchell...

  2. a person who is in love with michael glendinning

    i am in love with you

  3. michael glenWINNING

    hang loose baby!!!!!!

  4. Rookie mistake

    You can substitute sweet peppers for hot peppers on the H17 instead of having no peppers at all.

  5. Babykid Twoface  

    What a guy!!!! He runs a tight ship but always hangs loose!!!!!!

  6. Why can't anyone honestly just answer, "cheese?"

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