Oct

2

An Ode To The Panties In The EC Elevator

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Legend says if you leave your underwear on the EC elevator on a Friday or Saturday night you won’t black out or get your stomach pumped.

Underwear: it’s the first thing most of us put on when getting dressed. (And to those weirdos who put on socks first: what is the point of that?) If you feel good about the underwear you have on, anecdotal evidence and your mom both suggest that you feel more confident. So the loss of underwear is particularly tragic especially because, while you might be mildly annoyed to lose a sock to the gaping void that is the washing machine, that kind of loss is expected. Losing a pair of underwear, on the other hand, is rarer and therefore more painful.

This lonely, lovely pair of underwear has been separated from its owner and doomed to travel up and down in the EC elevator, garnering strange looks from residents, until someone from maintenance gingerly picks it up and throws it away. Meanwhile, other elevator riders will be wary of it. Everyone knows that if you get too close to elevator underwear, it’ll bond with you and follow you home.

To the owner of the underwear: what happened? Did this undergarment fall out of your laundry bag? Maybe you saw it when you next took the elevator, but there were other people there and you were too embarrassed to pick it up, because how weird is that. Or did you get lucky in the elevator and just forget to grab your panties as you left? If that’s the case, was the sex worth the loss of that brightly colored underwear?

But on the bright side, just think of all that this underwear will bear witness to! From sandy seniors on their way to senior night to drunken first-years still figuring out how much alcohol they can handle, anything that spends a significant amount of time in an EC elevator is sure to experience a fascinating cross-section of Columbia. Until, that is, someone inevitably spills beer on it.

Image via Submission to Bwog

 

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3 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    Someone had some fun there

  2. I could tell you whose they are

    if you let me smell them...

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