Barnard Buildings As Dating Apps

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Bwoggers, Barnard students, and roommates Sarah Harty and Lucy Danger explore the connections between our storied structures and online “romantic” services. There’s more parallels here than one might think. 

Delete this app. Tear down Altschul.

The Quad is Bumble. Barnard students must invite and sign their significant others into these dorms, similarly to how Bumble forces girls to message first. Softboys wait for responses like they wait in the Brooks and Sulz lobbies.

Milbank is Milbank was Barnard’s first academic building, built in 1896. was one of the first dating services that didn’t involve mail-order brides. Like Milbank, it maintains its original façade (seriously, the website looks like it hasn’t been updated since the 90s). Also, Barnard alum Martha Stewart has an account.

The Diana Center is Her. This one is obvious. Diana was nicknamed “The Vag” from its original name of the Vagelos Center. It’s confusing to men and they don’t seem to belong there.

Altschul is Tinder. It’s the place on Barnard’s campus where you can find the most straight men. Ugly but necessary. Where you pick up your mail, or your male.

Barnard Hall is CoffeeMeetsBagel. Hewitt Dining Hall is in the basement, where you can get coffee and a bagel at any time of day. The app promises to find its users “serious” matches, and if you take your SO to Hewitt, it better be serious.

The Milstein Center is The League. The League makes its would-be users stand on a waitlist for months on end, just as we’ve been waiting for a goddamn library. Still in its beta version. Isn’t actually that useful – whether Milstein will be remains to be seen…

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