My Spanish grade hates me right now.

We’ve all had that moment where we want to check the year the Defenestration of Prague took place, only to look up from our phone four hours later having read through the entire entry for rope. But, what happens if you let your wiki-binge take on a more Columbia-specific flavor? You can make some…interesting discoveries about our institutional history.

  • 1956The only information on this page is a single question: What happened? What did happen at Columbia in 1956? It seems the world may never know.
  • 1874This takes the 1956 page up to another level, forgoing words in favor of a single question mark.
  • Utada Hikaru: One of Columbia’s many famous drop-outs, the only things we apparently need to know about her is that she’s “the best Japanese pop singer on the planet” and that “there’s nothing not to like about her.” Honestly, I feel like that’s all that’s necessary.
  • Convocation: The most concise, accurate description of convocation you need; after reading this, you honestly don’t even need to go. Best quote: “Family members succumb to heat stroke. Parents bid teary farewells to their precious children, whom they must now abandon to immoral crime-riddled cesspool of heathens and sin that is New York City.”
  • Pinkberry:  Apparently Bwog once compared Spec to this “glassy neon virus” that infected the old Spec office. This is the kind of institutional memory I crave.
  • SpeccieA beautiful anthropological summary of those who write for Spec. Honestly, if I were a professor, I would give this an A+.
  • Princeton UniversityAll the WikiCU pages about other Ivies are gold, but a list titled “They stand for everything we hate” will win my heart every time.
  • Ken Hechtman: A guy who dropped out of Columbia after being caught keeping uranium-238 he stole the first floor of Pupin? I demand someone make a biopic about this man immediately.
  • PrezBo’s Projects: It’s just Wien, but this has a better ring to it, I guess?

timesuck via Bwog Archives