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May

11

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Portrait mode came THROUGH

Our final senior wisdom of the year is from Rachel Deal: EIC in late spring and fall 2016, queen veggie, conqueror of the Columbia double, Dunkin Donuts super-fan, and so much more.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Rachel Deal, Columbia College, Middle Eastern, South Asian, and African Studies, Medford, MA

Claim to fame: Running this damn website.

Where are you going? To run the Brooklyn Half next Saturday!

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Believe and support survivors! Stop socializing with known abusers!

2. In picking housing, prioritize sunlight over social life.

3. There are a lot of people at this school who lack morals! This used to bother me a lot, but I’ve found it best to accept that you cannot change others, and that there are way too many people here for you to hang out with the bad ones.

4. One more! Broadway au Lait has the best iced coffee in MoHi.

But wait, there’s more

May

11

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How we feel about Ross graduating

Ross Chapman spent three years as Bwog’s Sports Editor, which, because this is Bwog, meant he spent three years as Bwog’s entire sports section. We will miss him for his intense basketball statistics, his weird memes, and his big, big heart.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Ross Chapman, Columbia College, Music, West Windsor, NJ

Claim to Fame: I yelled at all of you from Butler Library for the inaugural outdoor Orgo Night with the Marching Band. I probably gave you a backrub at some point through Stressbusters. If you’re really special, then you know me as the former president of the Wind Ensemble. And I’ve written about 200 articles for Bwog, the website you are currently on!

Where are you Going?: I’m heading up to Northampton, MA for a year to live with my girlfriend as she finishes college. Then I’m headed to [REDACTED]’s JD program to become the law.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Take it easy in any way you can. Between your jobs, your clubs, your classes, and your social links, you’ll have to split a lot of energy, and you only have so much. Sleep as much as you can, and admit that you are not one of the 3% of people who can get by on 6 hours per night. Don’t take more classes than you need to graduate unless you absolutely love them. Don’t give your time to clubs that aren’t giving you anything in return. Go get dinner with a friend instead of claiming you “need to study” while you stare at a wall for an hour. This University seeps enough fun and energy out of you, so make sure you do what you can to make your time here enjoyable.

No, he’s not done talking about Orgo Night

May

11

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Megan, post-thesis

It’s not often that we have seniors join Bwog as new staff writers, let alone stick around for the whole year and write some of the funniest posts ever to grace this site. But Megan Wylie is here to prove that it can and should be done, and to give some of the best practical advice we’ve seen this semester.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Megan Wylie, Barnard, History and Political Science, New York, NY

Claim to fame: Getting rejected from WBAR in an email stating they accepted 87% of applicants and being a last minute undergradical

Where are you going? Nowhere (sorry guys). I’ll be ‘finding’ myself this summer, interning at a lobbying firm this fall and eventually ending up at law school

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Get to 1020 early so you can score the couch with peak visibility of the door. Furthermore, don’t bother going to any bar that doesn’t have a woman reading medieval literature guarding the door.

Math, Mels, and more after the jump

May

10

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Bold beautiful smile, perfect for a bold beautiful senior

Our last senior wisdom is courtesy of former Bwog Deputy Editor Lili Brown who takes us back to a simpler time of mom jeans and clogs and reminds us that your GPA isn’t what matters; it’s the friends you’ve made along the way.

Name, school, major, hometown: Lili Brown, Barnard, History with Gender & Sexuality concentration, Atlanta, GA

Claim to fame: I was your or your roommate’s Barnard tour guide, or I was your or your roommate’s AllSex facilitator, or you tried to shush me as my laugh emanated through LeFrak (which is a CHAT ZONE). I also was a bad journalist and written erotica vigilante during my brief tenure as a Deputy Editor of Bwog (it’s so good to be back you guys!). And finally, I am an unexpected senior night regular, and I’m one of the four to five women who come really early and demand that you give us as much room on the dance floor as that which we started the night with. I am still so, so sorry to the girl whose drink I knocked out of her hands while really getting down to Work.

Where are you going? The day after move-out for seniors I’m jetting off to Amsterdam, Berlin, and Paris with a good Barnard pal and I’ll finally get to say I’ve been to Europe, which seems like something that way more people than I expected have just done at some point in their young lives already (send us affordable recs!). Upon our return, I’m moving to Brooklyn and doing a series of part-time gigs, one of which includes being an archivist at a Yiddish archive downtown!

What are three things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. No one at this school is exactly like you. Just because we all got into this super insular or niche or small type of community does not mean we all want the same out of it, and sometimes this can make you really clash with people in different ways and in different magnitudes. If you come here looking for uncanny similarity — be it academically, socially, emotionally, etc — you will be disappointed. This took me so, so long to learn, and it was something I stopped trying to look for too late in the game. I’ve spent chunks of time here with genuinely lovely people, who, to be honest, were not my matches and I changed myself significantly in order to convince myself I wanted the same thing from college that they did. And I don’t regret that at all — phases in college academically, socially, or emotionally are so totally ok and part of the whole sha-bang of this thing. But each change was hard, especially because it took time for me to recognize that the people I was surrounding myself with didn’t want the same things I did; identifying what I want or what other people want is…difficult! It will amaze you how easily or slowly people come in and out of your life during these four years. A lot of relationships here are dependent on things completely outside of your control because we cannot possibly know what each person at this school is going through. With that said, come prepared to be utterly disappointed and completely inspired by the people you’ll encounter here.

More eloquent advice and a trip down memory lane.

May

10

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Gloriana would sell her soul to the marching band

Need someone to cheer you on when you’re destined to fail? Gloriana has some experience in that field and more in this Senior Wisdom.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Gloriana Lopez, Columbia College, Anthropology, San José, Costa Rica.

Claim to fame: #1 fan of Columbia athletes (but not athletics), former Bwog sports adjacent ™ , token Latin American international student of CUMB, that Orgo Night script reader who couldn’t turn pages, “that girl who plays the drums and is super loud”- Columbia Men’s Basketball, former Civil Engineer who decided to obliterate her job prospects by switching to Anthropology.

Where are you going? Back home :( . I’ll try to be an adult, get a job, apply to grad school, all that fun stuff.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?
I would like to quote my friend Evan who once said: “There are three things I have learned from Gloriana: 1. Always be yourself, 2. You can never be too enthusiastic and 3. If life gets too hard, you can always transfer to CC”.

Allow me to elaborate on these:

1. You do you. This means you should pick classes you are excited about (although sometimes that is hard), and find your people (which is also kind of hard here). Don’t worry about what other people are doing if you are happy with what you are doing, whether it is taking 6 classes and being in 23 organizations or taking 3 classes and never leaving your room. Have fun and take advantage of what this city and this school have to offer in a way that makes you happy.

It’s time for reflection

May

10

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Her lipstick (and everything else about her) is amazing

The rest of our senior wisdoms are coming from Bwoggers, current and former. To kick things off, we have Bwog’s director of communications, Gabbie Lipson, who wants to dispense from tough love and remind us all that we’re our own best advocate.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Gabbie Lipson, Barnard College, Psychology, Phoenix, Arizona

Claim to fame: I wrote Bwog’s apologies for the last 4 years as their Director of Communications. Got carpal tunnel for knitting during all of the NSOP activities I had to go to as an OL. I think I’m known for a few other
things but those get filed under infamous so we’ll just go with the above…

Where are you going? On a grand adventure! No, seriously, I’m still working out my plans but looking forward to seeing where life takes me. Though it will probably have something to do with studying babies. But if anyone reading this wants to hire me, I wouldn’t be opposed!

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. You are your own best advocate.
There are nearly 11,000 undergraduates at Columbia University (that includes SEAS, GS and Barnard, don’t get snippy with me, I’m making a point). We come to this school and operate under the expectation that every administrator, professor, and fellow student has our own best interests at heart. And in theory they do! But they can’t seriously think about all 11,000 of us individually at once. So advocate for yourself. There are people who will help you succeed but you have to make yourself known to them. I wanted to work in a lab but I couldn’t get funding and the hours interfered with classtime. I convinced my advisor and the department for long enough that they allowed me to take an independent study under my advisor even though I was working in a completely different lab. My advisor now takes the extra time to function as my liaison and works with my PI so that I can do what I love for academic credit. I wanted to present my research abroad but couldn’t find the funding. I poked around a bit, asked for some guidance and now, guess who’s going to Prague? This gal! The people at this school want to help. But they won’t know how or even that you need help until you stand in front of them and tell them what you need and why. You have a powerful voice, use it and then keep on using it.
See what other advice Gabbie has below!

May

10

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In focus

Today’s senior wisdoms are starting off strong with Nathan Rosin, CCSC president and Bwog’s friend from the fifth floor of Lerner.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Nathan Rosin, CC, Middle East South Asian and African Studies and Econ, Needham MA

Claim to fame: Received an email last year from Dean Kromm that she and Deantini wanted to explore what exactly the annual student snowball fight was all about for the first time, and I was out of bed like lighting a few minutes later to see just how well the Dean could toss a snowball – and he didn’t disappoint. Then, this year was personally challenged to a rematch snowball fight by Deantini via email alongside John and Nicole (clearly I did a good job last year, given that the Dean seemed to think he had some scores to settle) – and tbh I think I did a pretty good job the next day living up to the challenge (judging by the snowball I landed smack on his face). CCSC President, COOP leader, and McBain president once upon a time (responsible for Rush McB tanks…)

Where are you going? 50 blocks downtown, but probably won’t be able to stay even that far away for too long…

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. It’s so important to put in the time and effort to maintain strong friendships throughout your four years here. Sometimes it’s hard to remember or to make the time, and I’ve struggled at points to keep some friendships going that I really wished I had worked harder for, because it really is the people that define Columbia. When I graduate, I’m pretty confident I’ll remember my relationships and the people here in general as the best part about this place. The stories everyone has to share are unbelievable, and the support and encouragement people give each other carried me through my time here.

Classes, events, JJ’s, and more after the jump

May

9

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‘Slay.jpg’

Our last senior wisdom of the day comes from Joshua Burton: one of the few, the proud, the CCSC Sandwich Ambassadors.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Joshua Burton. Columbia College. Political Science. Buffalo, NY

Claim to fame: The first ever Sandwich Ambassador. The one black guy in CU Dems. The person who willingly decided to run student council elections his senior spring. That person always seen with Will Essilfie.

Where are you going? Currently, Dallas, Texas. But ask me again in a week.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Learn to trust yourself.

2. Even when you play yourself–it’s never your fault.

3. Act with the confidence of a man in salmon shorts.

Mourning 24-hour HamDel and more after the jump

May

9

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Hoping to look this content when we’re done with finals

Alissa Kruidenier is swooping in with some killer advice on moderating your time at Columbia. Oh, and she really wants you to staff CMUNNY.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Alissa Kruidenier, GS (Dual BA with SciencesPo), MESAAS and “Social Sciences,” Santa Barbara, California.

Claim to fame: Rick Riordan named me Demigod of the Week in 2009 and I think that may have been when I peaked. I’ve also probably asked you to staff CMUNNY.

Where are you going? To go give my friends as many hugs as I can, and then I’ll be moving to Arlington where my only life goal is to be able to cook dinner every night without feeling guilty about wasting time.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. One of my old jump trainers used to scream at me that you have to own the course and you can’t let the course own you. If you need to make a circle, make a circle. If you need to stop, stop. The threat of doing things in a certain order at a certain speed should never control you, and the healthiest and most dedicated people I know here are the ones who took all the time they needed. If you need an extension, ask. If you can and need to take a gap year, take a gap year. We get swallowed into the routine of Columbia and forget to circle when we need to and take a breather or talk to a therapist when it’s healthy. Also, on that note, just about everyone needs therapy at some point, and I think we have to normalize that more. Sometimes you hit rock bottom – or maybe, in my case, just smash through it – and you really need a professional to help sort things out. Always remember you’re in control; fight anything that makes you think otherwise.

Bagels, class recommendations, and more after the jump

May

9

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#whenwillbarnardhavefreelaundry

Rania Siddique spent too much time on econ homework but just enough time penning this short and sweet senior wisdom.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Rania Siddique, Barnard, WGSS + Econ, Lawrenceville NJ

Claim to fame: My winning sense of humor! Also SAFA and Well Woman <3

Where are you going? I’ll be around ;)

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Deadlines are fake

2. Friendship is the most important thing in the world

3. Being straightforward and telling people what you want is actually life-changing

“Back in my day…” m2m was two blocks away and I could get spicy beef udon whenever I wanted :(

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: Fun and flirty gemini / loves to laugh at her own jokes / would die for Lynette from Desperate Housewives

What was your favorite class at Columbia? Art/Work: Sex, Aesthetics, and Capitalism with Alex Pittman. This class is where I first learned about emotional labor in an academic setting and I haven’t stopped talking about it since. Ask me about my thesis if you wanna know more. ;)

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? Honestly how dare you

Whom would you like to thank? Simi for keeping me grounded and always calling me out on my shenanigans! Thanks sweetie!

One thing to do before graduating: Play spin the bottle

Any regrets? Not drinking enough water, spending way too much time on econ homework that i could not give a crap about

Photo via Rania Siddique

May

9

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Isaac looking fancy

Today’s first senior wisdom is brought to you by “famed biscuit bro” Isaac Bautista, who has taken some Ls but is here to share what he learned with you.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Isaac Bautista, Columbia College, Astrophysics, El Paso, TX

Claim to fame: Watching football in Butler and an unnatural sleeping schedule. Famed biscuit bro of fall 2015. Took some Ls but ended up with a bae.

Where are you going? Back home to the greatest state in the Union – the land of of low taxes, high speed limits, and loose gun laws.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Don’t get caught up in the rat race. While all your friends are trying to work for The Goldman Sachs, find something more interesting and fulfilling to do with your life. Or, do nothing. That’s ok too.

2. Kosovo is Serbia.

3. Explore the city. It’s easy to get trapped in the campus bubble. Go out and do cool things. You only have four years here and they’ll fly by before you know it.

A time before the Great Meme War and more after the jump

May

8

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Today’s Senior Wisdom poses are fire.

Need a good laugh and some words of encouragement to get through the day? Check out what Simi Olagundoye has to say about her time at Barnard. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Simi aka Sim Simma aka ya favourite Aunty, Barnard, Urban Studies (concentration in Africana studies), NYC via Lagos, Nigeria

Claim to fame: Retired co-president of the Black owned club that is Bacchanal, constantly inviting people to Well-Woman, took a class just to write a paper on Vin Diesel, and publicly out as a Sagittarius

Where are you going? Where am I not going?

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

Allow yourself to breathe and explore. Don’t force yourself into spaces because there are so many open doors that’ll allow you to grow and be yourself. Literally do *whatever* you want as long as it’s not harmful.
ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF! To quote a good friend “closed mouths don’t get fed”. ASK FOR EXTENSIONS/INCOMPLETES IN CLASSES IF YOU NEED!!! If a club/organisation is unnecessarily adding to your stress/unhappiness leave it. There is *no* shame in saying you need time/space because your health, both physical and mental, matters!!! Take up space when you need it and really figure out ways you can take care of yourself.

More words of wisdom after the jump

May

8

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Is Maddie at the Met Gala?

We have just four years to figure a lot of shit out. Being a Barnard student has its ups and downs, but Maddie Molot has some advice that might just make your time here a whole lot easier. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Maddie Molot, Barnard, Neuroscience, Woodbridge, CT

Claim to fame: Orchesis, camp kesem, wind ensemble, spec, varsity show, CMTS. Also can be seen lurking creepily in the back of pretty much every random campus event (usually because I’m taking photos of it, but sometimes just lurking)

Where are you going? I’m going to Diana to get a BBQ chicken pizza, where are you going?

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?
Go to stuff! There are so many amazing lectures, concerts, art shows, conferences, dance and theater performances, (even sports I guess??? Lol idk) going on all the time on campus. And most of the time they are free or very cheap! Go support your friends when they put on an event or have a show, it’ll mean a lot to them and you’ll prolly have a fun time too!

Looking for a good place to poop?

May

8

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A POWER POSE!

In our second Senior Wisdom, we’ve got Nza-Ari Khepra, future McKinsey employee and former Bacchanal President. Her greatest accomplishment? Graduating in one piece.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Nza-Ari Khepra, Columbia College, Chicago, IL

Claim to fame: I honestly have no clue…Bacchanal President? Gun violence prevention work? Still not sure I can claim fame.

Where are you going? Home! Catch me in Chicago, consulting for McKinsey.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

You’re not here to compare yourself. I know this seems like it’s a generic statement, but during my time here, I was surprised to see how many people allow comparison to negatively influence their mental and physical states. I understand many of you are going to pursue higher degrees or trying to get the best jobs out there, but those opportunities will be inaccessible if you break yourself trying to “keep up” with the stress culture this school and city permeates. Graduating in one piece, figuratively and literally, should be your one and only goal. Do that at your own pace, because you can’t compare where you don’t compete honeyyyyy (;

She’s right though

May

8

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The wise Miss Frizzle from The Magic School Bus once said, “Take chances, make mistakes, and get messy.” Learn about how senior Alangoya Tezel managed to do it all below. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Alangoya Tezel; Columbia College, Neuroscience and Behavior/Philosophy double major; Louisville, Kentucky

Claim to fame: During a Faculty House lunch, I convinced Mowsh to rename her problem book “The Learning Manual.” I’ve been the Victoria’s Secret PINK campus rep for two years, and I passed the Swim Test without knowing how to swim. I convinced my friend AJ to drop pre-med to pursue botany.

Where are you going? Medical school, I think? Practicing Emergency Medicine sounds like the dream.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

I’ve talked to so many first-years who feel like they have nothing figured out. In retrospect, I guess I felt like that, too. Just take it slow and remember that you have time to find your people (and you will) and you have time to find out where you want to be. In the meantime, hold onto the knowledge that everyone, albeit in varying degrees, feels the same way you do. This isn’t meant to be a negative thing but a communal experience. We’re all in this scary, transformative experience at Columbia together. You’re exactly where you need to be.

Apply for everything, even if you feel completely unqualified. One of the most powerful things one of my mentors told me is that “whether you say you can or you can’t, either way you are right.” I’ve gotten so many positions and jobs I never thought I would get, but because I was bold enough to apply and confident enough to believe in myself, I got them and learned so much. College, maybe more than any other stage of life, is about creating yourself, not finding yourself. Figure out what kind of person you want to be and try to put yourself in the experiences you need to be that person.

More wisdom after the jump

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