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Baked Erotica Has Never Looked So Good/Awful

Happening right now, on the Lerner Ramps, the Fed’s erotic bake sale. Plates of homemade chocolate chip and sugar cookies shaped like breasts, penises, and other anatomical delicacies are overflowing on blue plates.

Bwog noticed a conspicuous lack of male genitalia, to which Fedster Sophie replied, “We both go to Barnard, so there’s a bias,” referring to fellow chef/saleswoman Hannah.

In true Columbia fashion, both vanilla and chocolate frosting were used in creating the very multi-ethnic buffet. “That was my idea,” said Sophie.

All treats are going for a quarter, “though the twats might be worth more per size.” Appetizing! And though the money isn’t going towards any charitable ends, the bake sale is less a fundraiser and more of a Fedbash-awareness street performance. “Just come to Fedbash!” the three Fed editors manning the table yelled at Bwog.

Bwog asked how to spell “come” for this article and we were told it was up to our “editorial discretion.”

So come to Fedbash, this weekend in Lerner Party Space. There will be burlesque dancers and perhaps leftovers.

– JNW

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4 Comments

  • what do you says:

    @what do you call someone who steals from a bake sale?

    A crookie!

    1. what do you says:

      @what do you call someone who steals from an erotic bake sale?

      A dick.

  • Is this says:

    @Is this what was up with the felt vagina tacked to the Lerner swipe access entrance? Did anyone else see it? It had a jeweled clitoris and all.

    1. probably says:

      @probably the vagina monologues.

      nonetheless, it made swiping uncomfortably similar to the credit card portion of the tipdrill music video

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