In honor of Orgo Night, Senior Wisdoms continue with the marching band’s flautist extraordinaire.
Name, school: Zoe Lubitz, Columbia College
Claim to fame: CUMB Flutist, COÖP Leader (yeahhh bikers), Flute Choir President, former JJ6-er who indeed still takes the elevator
Where are you going? Forward. You know those old people who say college was the best four years of their lives? I’d like this to be untrue.
Three things you learned at Columbia:
1. Explore campus! You’ll discover things like: Always go through SIPA to get between EC and Appletree/Vino Fino. The vending machines in the basement of Schermerhorn. The locations of the most reliable printers on campus (I’m still searching). The cookies at Brownies. The incredible tree to the right of the chapel on the way to EC.
2. Facial feedback. Google it. Basically the idea is that if you smile, you can trick your brain into feeling happiness.
3. It seems cool these days to say that Columbia has no school spirit. I’d advise some more time with the Marching Band. Always go to Orgo Night.
“Back in my day…” Back in my day, I used to see Jonathan Taylor Thomas all over campus. Sorry to you guys who missed out on the Simba jokes.
Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: As a kid I was once on Sesame Street.
Is the War on Fun over? Who won? Any war stories? Well there was this one time at band camp…
Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? Cheese never disappoints.
Advice for the class of 2015
-Butler may be open 24 hours a day, but this does in no way imply that you should ever choose the library over sleep. Not only is sleep healthier than not-sleep, it is fun. Also, I hear there are bed bugs in Butler these days.
-Take classes you’re passionate about with professors who can actually hold your attention. It’s easier to learn when the material is interesting to you.
-Everyone sitting behind you in lecture can see your computer screen. Thanks to this phenomenon, I know what you shop for on the internet, I know who you stalk on Facebook, and I know that you’re addicted to colorful flashing internet games. I’ll withhold judgment.
-Keep in touch with your high school friends. If you didn’t have friends in high school, make sure you find people here that really mean something to you. Don’t try to lone wolf this college thing or it will be distinctly less fun.
Any regrets? More spicy specials.
Know someone wise? Tell us about them (and their UNI) at editors@bwog.com
27 Comments
@sari ZOE is amazing!!!!!!
@Van Owen I’d like to mate with you Zoe. All night long.
@jer ZOESTER FTW!!!! Ti Amo. Formaggio presto.
@Anonymous Zoe, I do hope it will be untrue. And, I suspect those folks who think otherwise are full of it, and have no foresight.
@JimJam We love you Zoe! go get ’em.
@CC '13 Alex Gortman!
@Anonymous i had totally forgotten about JTT… good times indeed
@Anonymous most reliable printers? dunno ’bout most, but here’s my list, in no particular order.
carman
wien
uris
@CMT ZOE, I LOVE YOU. You are the greatest.
@CC '11 Where’s Alex Gortman’s??!!
@CC '11 This girl’s is cute, but I think Bwog can do better/funnier. Where is Alex Gortman’s?
@BWOG!!! This is a great senior wisdom but…Where is ALEX GORTMAN’S senior wisdom?? It’s so funny!
@JH YAY ZOE! She’s the best. :)
@Ali Good advice–I like this facial feedback idea. Also, I completely agree on the computers in lecture thing–I once sat behind a kid watching a movie in Gulati’s principles.
@hey i still take the elevator too
jj6er
@ProudJJ6alum We will always take the elevator. Long live King Nedu!
@Anonymous Zoe is the greatest person in the whole wide world!
@bro she is so hot
@Anonymous I enjoyed this.
@gtbtb best senior wisdom
@have you read ANY? no, not really at all
@Anonymous yayyyyy zoe!!
@Anonymous Yeaaaahhhhh flute choir! Zoe’s the coolest. :)
@Anonymous there’s a flute choir? I want in!
@zoe!! a cool girl.
@ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP ROP
@BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP BOP