Top of Their Class: Facebook Heroes of 2015
Written by Bwog Staff
The advent of social networking brought radical new social dynamics to freshpeople interaction in the form of class-wide facebook groups. The Blue & White has discussed the discarded walls of years past, and explored the legend of everyman Aaron Phillips. This summer, delayed housing assignments precipitated an unprecedented maelstrom of activity on the 2015 page, which also showcased never-before-seen coordination amongst classmates, who figured out exactly who was in whose Lit Hum section, on whose floor, and what concerts they would attend together come fall.
A few voices rose above the fray—you remember those kids who were all over the Facebook page. Bwog’s freshperson of the people Bijan Samerah is meeting the people behind the profiles.
Name: Eric Donahue
Famous for: Posting endless tirades against the school’s financial aid department
“The front-page Wal-Mart ads about ‘be a cooooool regular college student with your waffle-iron-cofee-maker and your swanky postmodern plastic furniture and your Blu-Ray player and suave laptop for taking notes in the quad while everyone plays scooter-frisbee behind you in front of quaint brick buildings’ are just illusions for the wide majority of actual American families” – August 11 at 1:55 a.m.
“RETURN MY FUCKING PHONECALL” – August 1st at 1:53 p.m.
“Anyone else looking to start some SERIOUS NERF COMBAT this fall?!” – May 30th at 10:21 p.m.
Bijan sat down with Eric to discuss his life off the Facebook page:
Were your problems with financial aid sorted out?
“By posting on the group, I actually got my admissions officer involved. It actually got me farther in the appeals process than I would have gotten otherwise. I think it all came back to help me in the end.”
How does being a Facebook celebrity make you feel?
“It makes me feel like a million bucks because I could be pretty much eating a sandwich off of the ground and somebody would be like, “Oh my God! It’s Eric Donahue.”
What would you do with a Sunday off?
“Here, I would meet up with people on Low steps, talking about whatever weird conversations come up on Low steps (which can range from masturbation to four dimensional hyper cubes), and then top it off with some zombie versus humans.”
If zombies were to invade Columbia, what would be your escape plan?
“Go to the roof of Pupin and bring just enough people that we could cannibalize each other, but not so many that I would be cannibalized.”
Give us a brief rundown of your Nerf gun collection.
“I have a Vulcan, a Stampede, a Maverick, and mini blasters. I molded together different belts for the Vulcan, so I can load like fifty at a time. Bring it on.”