We know this can be frustrating, but that’s what whiskey’s for!

Dear Bwog, I’m a bit of a loser and haven’t made any close friends this year and am without a group for housing coming up. I’m a rising sophomore, what are my housing options?!
Sincerely,
Fucked for Housing

Dear Fucked for Housing,

Bwog sympathizes with your plight and, given that the Special Interest Community (SIC) application deadline has passed, has only a few suggestions:

1. Apply to the Living Learning Center—applications are due Friday. You’ll get a possibly renovated single, a nice kitchen, and will likely be living with some pretty cool people (and freshmen).
2. Roll the dice and go in for a blind McBain double in online selection (lone rangers left out from odd numbered groups go here as well). Even if you’re in the shaft, at least your room will be large and always warm.
3. Post in the Class of ’17 facebook group when you’re closer to the deadline. Everyone will be freaking out as much as you, and you’ll be sure to find some acquaintance that could use a roommate. If you’ve got a reasonably good number, you could escape the shaft of McBain for the smelly armpit of a walkthrough in Wien.

Wishing you the best in your search for a place to stay,
Bwog

A solitary man doing what solitary men do best via Shutterstock