New Jersey: the only state where loud mothers, Italian fuckboys, and a shitty bus system can coexist peacefully.

Another weekend has passed, meaning Bwog has been up to our same old shit since you’ve last heard from us. While some things that went on this weekend were wholesome, most of them weren’t. Here are some of the highlights of the Bwog staff’s weekends!

Bwog in the City:

• Walked the Brooklyn Bridge and took some hella artsy black and white photos.
• Smoked with my friends in Riverside Park while we watched the leaves change.
• Took the wrong NJ Transit bus and got lost in New Jersey while trying to pick up a package; ended up spending the same amount of money I thought I’d be saving on shipping by calling an Uber to get from the town I’d accidentally gone to to the town I was supposed to go to. Went back to New Jersey two days later.
• Went to a Princess Nokia concert in Williamsburg and she kicked me in the face while crowdsurfing. Very awesome. Not so awesome was the half-full strawberry lemonade svedka we pregamed with and then accidentally left on the street.
• Told two friends from out of town that I’d take them to the best NYC brunch of their lives… we ended up going to Absolute Bagel.
• Went to an arcade in Chinatown and watched my friend rack up a 300+ streak at DDR.

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Bwog with Friends and Lovers

• Celebrated my roommate’s birthday with her friends from home! Lots of blood, vomit, and lasting hangovers. 
• Became the first person to throw up in my friend’s new toilet in a renovated Carman suite.
• Pretty sure one of my roommates stole my joint and my lighter and smoked it while I was gone. :(
• Had my sound on my phone and while President Beilock was speaking, I got a notification for a match on Tinder.
• Saw a cute tourist from Mexico City at 1020, somehow seduced him but didn’t text him back.
• Responded to a romantic “I like you” with “I like chicken nuggets” as a way to avoid the issue at hand.

Bwog’s (Lack of) Wellbeing:

• Warmed a poptart via kitchen stove for breakfast.
• Scoped out every floor of Butler for a private nap spot, and then took a 30-minute nap in Butler
• Slept for 14 hours on Saturday.
• Bought a turtleneck online and received four by accident.
• Ate at least one bowl of Corn Pops a day for a week.
• Didn’t know any of my suitemates had Twitter until I got caught subtweeting one of them.
• Fasted for Yom Kippur but also because I only had one meal swipe left.
• Ate fried “chicken of the woods” mushroom, tasted like chicken to me. Haven’t had real chicken in 6 years.
• Fasted, but made an exception for three cough drops and some Alka Seltzer Cold & Cough because we’re all sick right now.
• Directed a Model UN committee the entire weekend and barely had time to eat or sleep, but somehow still got drunk every night of the weekend.

 Image of the Garden State From Hell via Blue Mountain Contractors