A rich person’s favorite spring break spot to exploit: Cancún!

Spring break, unfortunately, has passed, leaving us with all of the work we didn’t do over the past week stacked up. Relive your adventures with a summary of the Bwog Staff’s feats, summarized here in a cool, collected way. If you have any spring break stories of your own, send them to tips@bwog.com and you can be included too!

Bwog in the City:

• Sunbathed like a seal at the High Line.
• Got back to campus from the East Village alone and wasted on the subway at 4 am- twice
• Saw SpongeBob The Musical and it was amazing. A Squidward tap number almost made me cry.
• Spent 5 days with my best friends from high school enjoying all the free attractions NYC has to offer.
• Got two tattoos! Even after forgetting my ID in my dorm.
• Got solid relationship advice and psycho-analysis from my best friend’s dad.
• Snuck into the Mercury Lounge, got kicked out of the Mercury Lounge for being under 21, successfully got back into the Mercury Lounge.
• Did nothing (which still felt like too much)
• Took 70 photos for my birthday Instagram, thankfully found two (2) good ones

Bwog’s Trips:

• Went skiing in Utah. Have only skied twice (including this time), but successfully went down a black diamond.
• The Mormons tried to convert me in Temple Square. They failed. No coffee= no deal.
• Went home and kept forgetting that my dog (as of recently) was dead.
• Went skiing in Switzerland.
• Started off my break by coming down with a case of pneumonia and getting trapped in a blizzard. Didn’t leave my house for almost four days as a result.
• Spent a grand total of 16 hours on buses, got approximately 2 hours’ worth of work done
• Gave the friends I was visiting in Berlin no fewer than 20 Broadway playbills, a couple of which were signed, as a host gift.
• Bought a book by a professor I had last semester and a book by an artist whose talk I went to (and covered for Bwog) at Columbia last year at a Berlin bookstore; felt appropriately pretentious about it.
• Successfully navigated the Berlin bus system back to my friend’s apartment, while tipsy, without wifi/data, between 2:30 and 4:00 am.
• Got unbelievably drunk in Amsterdam, acquired a map of all the gay bars/clubs in the city, and attempted to find some lesbians; discovered that almost all of the gay clubs were men only and somehow ended up at a strip club instead.  Wish I remembered more of this tbh.
• Got kicked out of my hostel on Sunday morning, but was too hungover to do any more sightseeing and ended up going to the airport five hours early while my friends got high without me.
• Spent way too much money on vegan food in LA.
• Went to Six Flags! There was no lines for anything so we were in and out in a few hours.

Bwog and Food:

• Went on a crawl through Chinatown with high school friends. Then went to another bakery and K-Town for dinner. About to enter a full-on food coma. Send help.
• Ate so many amazing dumplings.
• Fell in love w Brie.
• Ate a 5 course meal every night for a week for FREE
• Got drunk w my mother and had to walk her back to the hotel through Zürich (how am I the responsible one).
• Had New Haven pizza for the first time!!! I’m never eating Koronets again.

Bwog and The Good Stuff:

• Did coke for the first time and it was deeply underwhelming.
• Got my one and only fake creased at a lenient bar I have been frequenting for some years.
• Tried herbal beer.
• Tried a bunch of new wines while enjoying the 18+ drinking age in Europe.. decided my new favorite is humagne rouge (also Swiss wines are so good everyone should try I highly recommend)
• Caught my little sister smoking, to both of our surprises. Made her give me half of what she had on her in exchange for my silence.
• Went on a quest for the perfect cocktail shaker in Berlin and ended up in this massive bar supply warehouse in a very industrial area.

Bwog and Love:

• Kissed my boyfriend.
• Got invited to a club by a former star of the Bachelor and my friend and I went back to his house just to play with his dog.
• Had a melodramatic conversation/confrontation with my ex at a San Francisco landmark and, while crying, was asked by a professional photographer to get out of the way of a couple’s wedding photoshoot.
• Flirted my way out of a moving violation.
• Blew off someone hitting on me at my bartending gig only to realize they were the one paying me.
• Guy at 1020 bought me a drink and immediately left so I’m in love with him now.
• Guy tried to hit on me while we were watching a movie with a group. In the middle of the movie. I don’t even go to school in the same state????
• Finally confirmed that the girl I’ve been seeing decided like 2 months ago she wanted to break things off but decided not to tell me about it until now.
• Made it official with my (first official) boyfriend.
• Put my boyfriend’s shirts in a plastic bag for the flight home bc I didn’t want the smell to be contaminated.
• Saw Black Panther and for like 5 minutes during one scene (you know the one I mean) I was no longer a lesbian.

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