Many of us are experiencing Columbia dorms for the first time, and we’re all rushing to make comparisons. Everyone’s busy making their own tier list it seems, so here’s one I’m sure you ALL were thinking about. 

John Jay – OK Computer

• The one everyone thinks is the best. The one everyone new to Columbia wants. The supposedly quintessential Columbia dorm experience. In reality, not a bad dorm but can be a let down and offers no surprises. 

EC – In Rainbows

• The actual best dorm. 

Wallach – The King of Limbs

• Truly out there doing its own thing. Never hear much about it. 

Wien – Kid A

• Cool place, weird place. Pipes hanging out of the ceilings, sinks in the rooms, just overall haunted house vibes. defies expectations. Pretty far from the middle of campus though, and it’s got mazelike corridors, so it’s a lesson in how to disappear completely.

Carman – Amnesiac

• A great dorm situated among other great dorms, but many don’t give it the attention it deserves until they step inside. Careful though, you’re living life in a glass house, what with all the sliding glass doors to the lounges. 

Broadway – The Bends

• Not the best but far from the worst, and severely underrated. has an absolutely bussin sky lounge. It did flood during the Great Sophomore Convocation Storm Incident however, so take evasive action if you need to get high and dry.

McBain – Hail to the Thief 

• Buzzing with energy, restless, even a little angsty. Attracts extroverts. If you’re not one, it can be difficult to go to sleep. 

Furnald – A Moon Shaped Pool

• Quiet, meditative space. Was the quarantine dorm last year, so beware of ill wind. 

Schapiro – Pablo Honey

• No one will say it’s that good, but it’s reliable to a T. Architecturally very 90s, and heavily resembles many contemporary dorms at other universities. Houses practice rooms in the basement, which you can access regardless of whether you’re a music student. They say anyone can play guitar. 

Radiohead from alterna2 via Creative Commons