Come to our open meeting, where you can pitch articles alongside Ice Spice, Greta Gerwig, and a horde of conniving mice.

Everyone should come to our open meeting! Come one, come all, etc. But while we open our arms to everyone, Bwog would like to extend some special invitations to a select few. We cordially invite the following to join us this evening at 9 pm in Lerner 510. 

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Flaco the Escaped Owl: You are the apple of my eye. I’m so proud of you for ignoring the zoo keeper’s cheap bait and mating recordings. Remember when they tried to lure you into a trap and you just sat next to it all unbothered? That was ice cold. They’re just trying to stand in the way of your success. 

Timothee Chalamet: Timmy, you will always be a Columbia alumni in my heart. I don’t care what NYU thinks. You can have all of our green grapes. I listen to your statistics rap at least once a week. Bring that energy to Lerner 510! 

Greta Gerwig: Greta!! I know you’ve been into movies these days, but joining Bwog is the career move for you. You won’t get paid, and you won’t be eligible for any awards. Also, we can’t provide you with the platform to make high-quality, high-budget content. As independent student journalists, we’re operating at a pretty minimal capacity. But if you ever wanted to write a college-themed shortform piece, we’ve got you covered. Plus, I’ve heard that Bwog articles are the new Ladybird, in terms of artistic caliber and entertainment value. This is just a casual thing I heard in passing. 

Chef Don and Chef Mike: We’ve had a lot to say about both of you this week, so we’d like to cordially invite you to our open meeting. You are welcome to write speculative short forms about us in retribution–it seems only fair. 

Ice Spice: Please please please do Bacchanal. You are so cool.  

The Mice of Sulz Six: I hear you in my radiator when I’m trying to fall asleep. If you come to the open meeting, I will introduce you to Flaco, a fellow bwogger and good friend.

Taylor Swift: We are not a multi-billion dollar record label. But what we lack in recording studios, A-list producers, and sold-out stadiums we make up for in heart, soul, and the little room we borrow from Columbia for an hour a week. Also, sometimes we have fun snacks like pickles. 

NYU Local: We’ll show you around Morningside Heights. We’ll take you to all the hottest spots around town (Lerner 510). We’ll give you a sexy little wink. Was that a wink or a blink? you will wonder. But nonetheless, you will find us endearing. NYU Local, you have stolen the heart of Bwog. Come to our open meeting, where we will be chivalrous and witty and charmingly self-deprecating. 

Bwog’s newest staff writers via Bwog Staff