This one is for everyone who was sick over Thanksgiving break. I understand your struggles and I commiserate.

To those of you who experienced healthy, rejuvenating breaks a week and a half ago, I am genuinely happy for you and equally envious. I hope you all enjoyed your time off and your Thanksgiving dinners went as smoothly as possible. For the rest of us, though, who were absolutely violated by the flu over the break, allow me to share my personal experience as a source of solidarity and lighthearted recollection of a less-than-ideal week of my life. I hope you have all made full recoveries by now as I have and are navigating this finals season with clear sinuses.

Thanksgiving break was supposed to be a relaxing, restful, rejuvenating time. I was supposed to catch up on sleep, binge watch season two of The Bear, and get a head start on my final essays for three different classes. I was supposed to see my hometown friends to catch up with them for the first time in months. I was supposed to let myself breathe.

In actuality, that did not happen (both literally and figuratively) because I became deathly ill and was bedridden for 90% of the break. What started off as an itch in my throat on the Sunday before Thanksgiving became a suspiciously severe headache and sore throat on Tuesday, the last day of classes before the holiday. I remember the journey home that day, lugging my baggage through Penn Station to catch my train, fighting full body aches and vertigo. When I finally got home, I showered, ate dinner, and crashed for a full twelve hours.

The next day, I woke up in a confused daze, burning up, feeling lightheaded but also like I weighed twice my body weight. My sinuses were congested, every muscle was sore, and my throat felt like sandpaper. At one point, my fever broke 102. I was genuinely, deathly, violently ill. I think this was the sickest I have ever been in my entire life. I spent almost that entire Wednesday tossing and turning in bed, and I think there was a phase where I experienced actual hallucinations and delusions. It sounds insane to explain to someone else, but in my feverish dream-state, I became fully convinced that I had gotten tangled up with the Italian mafia and somehow curing my sickness was a part of some business deal of sorts. I have no idea where that storyline came from and I won’t elaborate further because I’m just as confused looking back on that as you probably are. In any case, I was indescribably, viciously, comically ill.

As you could imagine, this almost completely prevented me from enjoying my break. I couldn’t see my friends, I had no appetite, I couldn’t enjoy any of the TV and movies I wanted to catch up on (I only got through half of season two of The Bear, sorry Carmy.), and most devastatingly, I couldn’t do any of my schoolwork. I was sick enough to the point where I was too exhausted and delirious to even do my readings. Thankfully, by Friday, I had figured out that I was sick with a lovely combination of the flu and what was likely tonsillitis, and had started taking some antibiotics to help my recovery. However, the damage was already done. Over half of my break was lost to attempts at sleeping the illness off, and by the time I finally started feeling like a person again on Saturday, it was already nearly time to go back to school.

Sunday rolled around, and though my body had finally triumphed over its physical ailments, my soul felt utterly defeated. The week loomed ahead of me, filled with all of the work I had not been able to complete or get a head start on. I was genuinely screwed. Two books left fully unread that were required for that week, three essays left unplanned, and a problem set untouched. The Sunday of my return to campus, I pulled an all-nighter working on a paper proposal that was due that Monday before my 10:10, kicking off the final stretch of the semester on an incredibly shaky foot. 

Looking back on it now, it honestly could have been worse, and I hope I don’t come across as too whiny in my retelling (this was an attempt at humor). Despite this harrowing experience, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I was still incredibly grateful that I fell ill at a time where I was able to recover in the comfort of my own home and with the help of my parents. I can’t imagine what it would have been like if I had had to try to nurse myself back to health alone in my dorm room. I am also incredibly grateful that I was able to go home at all. Although I am now suffering academically from the effects of my sickness, I am thankful for my recovery and for the upcoming winter break where I’ll finally be able to rest the way I wanted to over Thanksgiving.

To those of you who are also struggling through finals season after battling illnesses (especially illnesses over break), my heart goes out to you and I offer my deepest sympathies. I have been there and done all of that. Stay strong, soldiers, and drink your Emergen-C.

Tissues via Flickr.