Feeling unlucky in love. Trust me. You probably aren’t the only one. Let’s be unlucky (and loving) together.

Leaving behind January has a lot of feelings that come with it—melancholy feelings, feelings of hope, and everything in between. Not only has it been a month of endless weeks (hello week 19.), the season of gloom (i’ve been counting and we have not seen the sun in 12 of said days) and the return to school, but it also is the first month of a new year—calling on each of us vowing to do better and be better than we were in 2023, whatever that may entail. But as us Barnumbia students settle into a new semester, it is inevitable that the thoughts of what each month ahead will look like creeps into the corners of our minds—giving us some sort of motivation through the cold days. Besides the fact that getting through January is an accomplishment in itself, I have come to realize that I cannot spend every single weekend in my apartment watching European rom coms and imagining I am summering in Italy, no matter how ideal that sounds amidst the freezing temperature of New York City winter. So instead of these cinematic fantasies, I’ve begun to think of things to look forward to in the coming months that are more tangible and actually realistic. Galentine’s Day, Spring Break, Saint Patrick’s Day, the return of spring in the city and finishing my last final come the beginning of May. 

However, as we start at the beginning, I can tell you I am probably not the only person feeling and anticipating the inevitable dread that will come waltzing around on February 14. Valentine’s Day. For me, it calls to mind internal sadness, ordering Thai food, and pretending I haven’t been single for more years than I have fingers on my two hands. Yet this year, I have vowed to be more positive—which is something that I definitely do not vow to do all the time. But then again, I’m trying to be better than I was in 2023.

With my vow, I have decided  to look forward to this season of love that is going to flood my feed as something I can plainly ignore and move on from, rather than something I let get to me as I watch couples I never even knew existed pop up on my Instagram feed (Hello person from 5th grade…when did you get a boyfriend?…). It can be so hard to opt out of social media during this bleak time of the year, but I am telling you in this ode to a season of love that can bring up so many emotions, the best thing to do is turn it off, mute it and say no more—unless you are watching edits…then go ahead and be my guest, keep watching Drew Starkey or Jacob Elordi all you want. 

Indeed, take this seemingly “lonely” time to invite your single friends over and bake a cake, listen to Lover or go to a painting class (just a few ideas on my February to-do list, pretty much anything you have been itching to do). Laugh at the fact you can eat the molten chocolate cake you bake without worrying if it’s going to get on your clothes in front of your date at a fancy restaurant–cause who wants to be mad while eating something so delicious. Enjoy the energy of screaming I Forgot You Existed by Taylor Swift in your living room. Because while I am convinced every single one of you has a person you are glad to have forgotten in your life, nothing beats loneliness like the notes of a Taylor song. 

For in the end, love does not only have to be in the form of a boyfriend or girlfriend. It can also be in the form of a best friend, parent, pet or truly just with yourself. Create that love where it already exudes in your life through music, writing, crafting, exploring or wandering through the different parts of the city—looking for what makes you radiate a glowy ball of warmth inside. Find love when you drink hot chocolate on a cold day or get to the best part in your book where the enemies FINALLY become lovers. View love as a way to express that you value and care about yourself and others—not as a spectacle put on display for all to see on social media. Self love, platonic love, agape, amore—look forward to celebrating love this month, in whatever lovely way it may look like to you. 

Heart candies via Bwog Archives.