So annoying, yet so satisfying when they actually work.

The water fountains are everywhere around campus. Not everyone uses them, but for me, they’ve become an essential part of my everyday routine and daily water intake.

Before Columbia, I never trusted these bottle filling stations. My elementary, middle, and high schools all had them but I was always wary of them, not wanting to risk my health when who knows what those grimy kids did to those water fountains. But when I came to Columbia and realized I was too lazy to filter or boil my own water, I was forced to start using and putting my blind faith in these Elkay ezH2O fountains. 

Sometimes, they can be truly infuriating. As one Sidechat post very aptly portrayed: 

Very cinematic indeed. Picture this: I’m already running late to class, but I’m in desperate need of water. I find the nearest water fountain, whip out my bottle, and place it by the sensor, expecting to soon obtain the H2O I need. But, guess what? The water fountain senses my urgency and so decides to let out the thinnest stream of water known to man or simply drip a few measly drops of water out. And then after filling up only 1/1,000,000 of my bottle, it will stop and tick up its “saved bottle” count, satisfied with its mediocre job like a student who rewards themselves with a phone break after creating the Google Docs for their essay (totally not guilty of this myself…). So, I end up standing there like a severely parched idiot, waiting for the fountain to take its sweet time, so that by the time I’ve finally filled up my bottle half my day is gone and the bottle count has gone up by 1000 (we’re really saving the turtles here…). 

Other times, I find the filter status of a water fountain to be orange or even red for weeks on end (*cough* John Jay dining hall *cough*). The fact that many fountains are found near bathrooms makes me feel quite uncomfortable about what water actually comes out of red or orange status fountains…

But, I don’t totally hate these dispensers of water. Whenever I find a fountain that has a really fast stream, I immediately feel a wave of dopamine, as if I won the lottery. It’s like gambling to see whether the water fountain will work every time I refill my bottle. And recently, Butler replaced all of the old water fountains (thank goodness, because the one near the main reading room especially was testing my limits every time) with new, sleek, midnight black bottle filling stations that are really nice. So far, they have been reliably good, so that every time I go to Butler I look forward to filling up my bottle in seconds. 

Water fountains at Columbia are a hit-or-miss. Sometimes they might treat you like a peasant and deal out their precious commodity (sometimes of dubious quality) in the slowest way possible, but I can’t truly hate them when they bring me great joy and satisfaction in the times they do their job well. Petition to get the Butler water fountains everywhere!!

Header via Bwog Archives