Staff Writer Sarah Braner writes about the gruesome winds on campus today.

The windows screech, straining against the unforgiving gales. Unfortunate souls who left theirs open return to frozen wastelands of dorm rooms. The Hewitt 7 bathroom has become an Alaskan tundra, thanks to some madwoman who dared invite Zeus himself in through the window. Leaves free themselves from the chains of gravity to pelt innocent passersby. Those with the foolish idea to don headwear quickly realize their mistake as they grip their hats in desperation, lest Aeolus snatch it right off their heads. The overpasses of the Quad are no longer walled safe havens, but baleful wind tunnels that threaten to knock any pedestrian off course. A peaceful stroll across campus becomes a battle against the elements, Nature hurling everything she has at you in a mighty effort to keep you from getting to Hamilton. Those making the trek from Plimpton praise the sky gods in a desperate effort to earn safe passage. Those coming from anywhere beyond 113th street haven’t been heard from in days. And woe be to anyone trying to fight their way to campus from Cathedral Gardens.

It’s fucking windy outside, and the unceasing vortex shows no mercy.

Victory of the elements via Bwog Archives