Saturday Daily Editor Lauren Kahme delves into various styles of hair from the early 1900s as they relate to notorious Columbia University student stereotypes.
The VSCO Girl – Short Middle Part Pin Curl Brushout
Attributes:
- Tries hard to look famous
- Keeps up with the trends
- Tries hard to look like one who does not try hard
The First-Year Stuck in High School – Smoothed Out Curls With Rolls
Attributes:
- Calls parents at least twice a day, every day
- Consults an adult figure when making any decision (including when registering for classes)
- Yearns for the high school glory days of ease, hope, and joy–directly oppositional to what they experience now
The Sellout – Deep Side Part With Slightly Brushed Out Pin Curls
Attributes:
- Majoring in Economics or Computer Science
- Has a vision board which includes a top-five “wish list” of dream companies for hire post-graduation
- Redoes LinkedIn photos every season because “[their] face becomes increasingly professional every six months”
The Type-A – Short Finger Waves With Slightly Droopy Curl In Front
Attributes:
- More uptight than at least 70% of students on campus
- Cries over the question answered incorrectly eleven weeks ago
- Maintains an overly organized system of folders and subfolders
The “Chad” – Slicked Back Without Any Part (image on the far right)
Attributes:
- Indulges in the fraternity lifestyle
- Belongs to a family who owns at least three homes
- Genuinely believes that the first day of the weekend is “for the boys”
The Classic Intellectual – Middle Part With Slicked Down Sides (image second from left)
Attributes:
- Understands quantum physics
- Struggles to ask romantic interests out on a date
- Sweetly shy and awkward
BONUS! You cannot tell me this doesn’t resemble PrezBo’s great great great great great grandfather.
Kreml Hair Tonic via Flikr
LinkedIn Portrait via Wikimedia Commons
Vintage VSCO girl via Wikimedia Commons
Senior Portraits via Wikimedia Commons
The Rule Follower via Wikimedia Commons
PrezBo Lineage via Wikimedia Commons
Columbia vs. Amherst Football via Wikimedia Commons
1 Comment
@Anonymous Just realized all of these people are dead. Now I’m sad.