Bwog goes back to school and remembers that hey, education is actually kind of fun!
Bwog was a good student:
- Actually did my sociology readings
- A novel concept!
- Was genuinely excited for (Zoom) school
- Geeked about translation studies
- Cried because I love translation studies
- Learned a lot about the definition of a city and how we describe it in population terms isn’t totally accurate or fair
- Finally learned who the fuck Hegel is
- Felt the amazing feeling of vibing really hard with some assigned reading
- Remembered why I love college
Bwog was a somewhat chaotic student:
- “Accidentally” looked up my cute TA on LinkedIn
- Now he can definitely see that I viewed his profile
- Muted my lecture so that I could hear TikTok better
- Attempted to pause a live lecture…
- Looked sexy and mysterious during class, showing everyone on the Zoom lecture that I am the main character
- Overused the word “sexy”
- Started Zoom ballet
- Regretted Zoom ballet.
Bwog stressed about school:
- Continued to contemplate on whether or not I should drop my art history lecture because I’m at 19 credits and I don’t know if I could handle that
- Contemplated my major for the 60th time
- Decided that my ideal career would be getting paid to live my life like a seal in the zoo—swim around, lie on rocks, get fed
- This was ~definitely not~ fueled by anxiety about having no idea what to major in
- Debated whether or not I understood math, wanted to understand math, should just become pre-law, or should abandon having career plans at all in the span of one 75 minute class before realizing I did actually understand what the professor was talking about
- Realized all the online gym classes are synchronous
- Then proceeded to realize that my schedule is royally fucked because of it
Bwog interacted with the real world:
- Walked a lot
- Vibed in and near the ocean
- Ran a lot
- Saw a bright orange mushroom!
- Did not eat it.
- Went out for coffee and knew everyone I saw
- It’s a small town
- Went for my weekly walk outside with my dad, this time to John Jay park
- Made shitty cupcakes
- Had a Zoom magic show with my family
… Or not:
- Went to sign a lease for an apartment
- Realized I couldn’t because I wasn’t adult enough to have checks
- Was ghosted by my psychiatrist
- Listened to “Alice’s Theme” by Danny Elfman an unhealthy number of times
- Cried x2
- Did shrooms with my sister while wearing sparkly party hats
Image via Pikrepo
1 Comment
@Learn to code >”Finally learned who the fuck Hegel is”
>switches major to Gender Studies
>cuts hair and dies it purple
>gets a bunch of tattoos
>gains 40 pounds
>comes out as bisexual
>drops out of Columbia
>becomes a barista
>blogs on the side
>resents boomer parents who pay for everything