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Those darn freestyle soda machines can paralyze you with indecision and fill you with questions: “Which drink is the best?” Fear not, for I have an answer.
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There is absolutely zero justification for a Celsius to cost more than four dollars.
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Next up: Columbia will begin requiring a minimum of four semesters of rizz to gradute.
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At 4 pm on Tuesday, students gathered at the Sundial for an emergency rally in support of displaced Palestinians in Rafah.
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Free yoga for midterms season! Get on it! Editor’s note: mentions of violence, death.
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Some cling to their major to help supplement their identity, some cling to their “signature scent”, why not combine these two crutches into one? How fun! FYI I am fully qualified for this task.
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Same Semester, New President!

What Should Acting President Claire Shipman's Nickname Be?

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Recent Comments

this senior is indeed very wise (read more)
Senior Wisdom: Sebastian Bader
May 14, 2026
Commercial carters mechanically recycle using shred-soak-scrub-float. Some countries store trash underground. Since trash piles coincide with subway stops, subways can be used (read more)
Bwog In Bed: Garbage Edition
May 12, 2026
melania the absolute best (read more)
Senior Wisdom: Melañia Horowitz
May 11, 2026
Ahmed via Ahmed (read more)
Senior Wisdom: Ahmed Abouelnaga
May 10, 2026

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