Tonight is the night before the organic chemistry final, and you know what that means. Yes: obscene humor, Barnard jokes, and chemistry word-play–all part of a typical Orgo Night. And that’s all this semester’s Orgo Night was: typical. However, it did have its entertaining parts, and it was a worthwhile Columbian experience, if only to say that you got to hear Barnard jokes in Butler.
The jokesters started off a little slow, and this slowness characterized much of the show, especially when compared to last semester’s performance, which was longer as well. The pair began making references to Deans and had a sly Varsity Show jab before moving on to cracking jokes about Bwog and Bwog commenters. These garnered laughs, but the main theme of the first act seemed to center around two controversial topics of the day: the Catholic priest molestation scandal and health care reform. The second topic’s story was based around Columbia enacting its own health care reform, and the audience seemed to receive this well. Again, there was your typical GS joke (Why is Health Services stopping coverage at age 26? “No one really cares about GS!”), but there were some better ones (CAVA will stop denying people due to pre-existing conditions, such as living in Carman).
As usual, the duo then continued lampooning current events. In this next segment, they managed to insult three major religions and joke about the crisis in Haiti, all while receiving the standard reaction of laughter-turned-groans from the audience. They then referenced Ahmadinejad’s recent return to the United States, asking why, if he hates America so much, he keeps visiting. This was craftily tied into a news topic of the day when it was announced that Ahmadinejad had just finished watching a Broadway play when he was shocked to discover his green 1998 Nissan Pathfinder was towed and Times Square cleared out. (To his credit, “bombs come standard” in Iran.)
Next, they talked about Columbia being ranked as the No. 2 most stressful college in the nation, to which 209 erupted with a prideful cheer. If you were waiting for the part where they mention other Ivies, here it was. They joked about how different Ivies cope with stress: “Brown has pass/fail; Princeton has racism”–all themes we’ve heard before. They finally reached Cornell, where the majority of their jokes involved puns such as “head over heels” or “hitting rock-bottom,” clearly referencing the recent tragedies at the university. The audience seemed to agree that this came a little too soon, only mildly chuckling at these puns. And to the band’s credit, perhaps they were showing some sensitivity, and did not have anything outstandingly and blatantly insulting–unlike how they treat, say, Barnard.
They ended with your characteristic comparison of the College, SEAS, and Barnard, framed around what the class of 2010 will be doing after graduation–the CC grad has an unpaid internship; the Barnard grad is married to an 80 year old. This segment perhaps produced the biggest laugh of the night, thanks to a vocal audience member. After the performer said that the SEAS graduate is laying in bed with a bombshell of a woman, a male (presumably SEAS student) in the audience gave a large cheer. The joker responded, “…At least that’s what she’s programmed to be,” causing the heckler to be rightfully humiliated and the audience to roar with laughter.
While the jokes tonight weren’t necessarily fresh, Orgo Night succeeded in doing what it has always done: provide a sense of community. Even though we’ve heard all too much that SEAS students don’t get laid, there’s something about hearing the fact that SEAS students don’t get laid while crammed in Butler 209 with a bunch of friends and strangers that is special. And as is typical, Orgo Night managed to provide that special sentiment and was an enjoyable performance.
– DH
45 Comments
@Get with it, bwog “They finally reached Cornell, where the majority of their jokes involved puns such as “head over heels” or “hitting rock-bottom,” clearly referencing the recent tragedies at the university.”
Oh please. Dead Cornell students aren’t the tragedy, live ones are.
@Anonymous Ok, I know that the band wants to push the envelope and everything, but the avocado joke was WAY THE FUCK OUT OF LINE. Band, that was disgusting
@Amedeo Avogadro I found the joke confusing me with avocados deeply offensive. I’ve spent years being ridiculed by high school idiots who know nothing, and now I don’t need some punk-ass college students adding to this.
I’m not a fucking vegetable.
@my uncle was an avocado. He died for your guacamole. So maybe it’s time you AND the Band stopped being so crude and realized the sacrifice he and others like him make every day for your taste buds.
@First Amendment Scholar I just heard the the band is getting sued by the Ant-Dip-Defamation League. Apparently, Queso and Salsa are claiming that they were purposefully excluded from the script based on the color and flavor of their dollop. When asked to comment on the controversy, guacamole was quoted saying “it’s the pits!”
@:( bah-dum chh.
@carnivore I am deeply offended by the avocado joke. As a carnivore, this makes me uncomfortable, some of us have trouble facing the harsh reality of eating fruits and vegetables, and your satire has triggered post traumatic stress disorder. GOSH HOW CAN YOU BE SO INSENSITIVE, BAND!?
@clarification this is an example of irony
@what was the avocado joke again?
@Anonymous Avagadro’s number is to a mole as Avacado’s number is to Guacamole.
http://cuband.org/scripts.php?script=87521
@Anonymous It’s too vulgar to reprint here on Bwog. And that’s saying something.
@? I don’t get the avocado thing…
@Anonymous there weren’t that many Barnard jokes…
@Veggie Lover Don’t associate avocados with chemistry. They have enough problems of their own.
@um don’t associate chemistry with avacados – Avagadro’s number is sacred. i found that joke incredibly offensive.
@chemist Avocados are delicious. And as a chemist, I have to say, Avagadro’s number often makes me think of a ridiculous amount of avocados.
@Harmony Hunter where was this? couldn’t find it
@it was in and around Harmony
@me you were mentioned, aren’t you proud?
@you were doing your homework
@The girl on the chair during Hava Nagila was pretty cute
@Anonymous She’s a prefrosh, you perv.
@too soon for the haiti joke.
@Forum Warrior Too soon is the theme for orgo night every single semester.
@too soon for an avocado joke. the band has finally gone too far, that joke was disgusting
@who was the chick on the chair
@cumb she’s barnard 2014
@uh - – right.
2012. Good try, though!
@No, 2014 Poor attempt, though!
@I gave this post a thumbs up to counteract the thumbs downs, which i felt were unwarranted
@Seriously She is a Barnard prefrosh who is related to a current bandie.
@I think the two people reading the jokes out were kinda cute… the guy seemed to lose his never every so often and react too much to the audience though, but still kinda cute
@yeah bree is so adorable, and that guy has been hilarious at every orgo night i’ve seen. i bet he’s in seas!
@CUMBer Devon Grandy is in CC and Bree Doering is in Barnard.
@needs cilantro the guacamole pun was tasteless
@I agree The cumb is full of vegetable molesters. Who would even think of a joke so vile?
@TOO SOOOON!!!
@Anonymous i liked the avocado joke
@Avacado too soon
@Anonymous I HATE YOU SO MUCH BWOG
@Anonymous I HATE YOU BWOG
@Anonymous Yeah, suicide is hilarious
@um the performance was capable of being satisfied?
@the blue magi the reading of the letter killed it… you can’t read jokes. JENGA
@Anonymous beautiful review. brought tears to my eyes.