Actual Wisdom: Stacey D’Erasmo

Written by

ultra classy

Intense gaze wisdom

1. Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer.

I don’t need to justify my existence–I wasn’t responsible for it. But since I’m here, I hope that by the time I’m gone I’ve written a few things and loved a few people well.

2. Your claim to fame (what makes you special?):

Oh man — no idea. I do have a good sense of humor, I think.

3. What’s your most valuable or unexpected college experience?

Listening to Borges, nearly blind, read in Low Library as several pigeons circled high above him.

4. What’s the craziest student excuse/extension story you’ve heard?

A student who regularly missed class to hop trains told me that the reason she wasn’t in class was that she had a severe disability: irritable bowel syndrome.

5. Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? *in the spirit of discretion, you can instead answer: “Would you rather give up tenure or cheese?*

Ha! Cheese. And, regarding the below discretionary option, tenure is no substitute for oral sex, nor vice versa.

6. Back in my day…

We were practically slackers compared to students today. Seriously. It was great. I spent a huge amount of time riding downtown with friends in Checker cabs and coming back in time to watch Pee Wee Herman on television the next morning.

7. Three things you learned at Columbia:

How to read.
How to write.
How to talk.

8. What’s your advice to students/academics/the human race in general?

Enjoy the ride.

Stacey D’Erasmo via

Tags: , , , , ,


  1. Anonymous

    some people have such bad IBS that they can't stay in college or hold a job. she shouldn't just straight-up dismiss it... it's not a joke.

  2. Faculty:

    It will neither compromise your credibility nor your sincerity if you smile in your pics!

    • Coming from a minority perspective...  

      I can't help but laugh every time I see this phrase. Recently,whenever someone disapproves of another person and his/her ideas, it's always: "check your priviledge." Like what did she even say that suggested she was unaware of social injustice, inequality, or whatever the fuck that phrase means. Just stahp already. It sounds stupid.

    • culturally speaking  

      you're a rapist

    • these comments

      are so unnecessary! going out of your way to discredit social justice work without being provoked makes you look silly and petty and even more ignorant to social justice issues than one might otherwise be able to glean had you not poorly satirized every bit of jabbing material that came your way. yeah it's a `joke` but a joke without context is just bullying and none of us are here for that.

  3. Have you ever noticed  

    A lot of traits are inversely proportional with earing hoop size.

  4. more like  

    Stacey D'Orgasmo

  5. Anonymous  

    "i hope that by the time i've gone...i've loved a few people well."

    i like this.

  6. Writing teachers

    are the best. And Stacey is both a fantastic person and a FANTASTIC teacher. She cuts to the heart of what you're trying to write and critiques kindly but with truthful precision. Now that she's the director of the undergrad program, means all you undergrads have more chances to take her classes. --love, a grad.

  7. anon

    I second the above comment and must add praise for Stacey. What a professor!

© 2006-2015 Blue and White Publishing Inc.