Hewitt 3 Bathroom Closing

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What we imagine the Barnard bathrooms look like

Apparently, potty-training should be the tenth way of knowing.

Barnard quad third floor residents received an email from the Associate Director for Residential Life detailing the closing of the 3rd floor Hewitt bathroom until April 5.

The email detailed the issues with this bathroom, including “feces smeared on toilet seats and the floor, urine on the floor, clogged and overflowing toilets, paper towels clogging the sinks, and garbage strewn around the bathroom,” which is fucking disgusting. In case some people just doesn’t know how to use the bathroom, the email also includes a guide to “proper use of our restroom facilities.”

According to the email, residential staff believe that “the responsible individual(s) may need the resources and support of the counseling center.” Bwog doesn’t want to think too much about how much damage would have to be done for this kind of email, but hopes that whoever it is gets the support they need and that everyone else remembers to clean up after themselves.

Here’s the email, with the most important parts bolded:

Dear Quad Third Floor Residents (including each member from Brooks, Reid, Sulzberger, and Hewitt):

It is with great disappointment that I write to you.

As some of you may know, we have been experiencing many issues with the 3rd Floor Hewitt Bathroom. These have included vandalism, improper behavior, and a complete lack of respect. Over the past few months, we have seen feces smeared on toilet seats and the floor, urine on the floor, clogged and overflowing toilets, paper towels clogging the sinks, and garbage strewn around the bathroom. This only lists some of the inappropriate behavior we have seen.

Alex Schoeneck, the RA for Hewitt 3, Hewitt’s Graduate Hall Director, Omar Miranda, and I have been brainstorming ways to address this behavior. Alex has been communicating frequently with her residents to ask for information and request for the behavior to stop; Alex and Omar have held a mandatory floor meeting for Hewitt 3 residents, and posters have been placed in the restroom requesting for this behavior to cease. In addition, we have been working with staff from Facilities and Furman, believing that the responsible individual(s) may need the resources and support of the counseling center based on what we have witnessed in this bathroom. Unfortunately, even as we are getting back from Spring Break and trying to focus on wrapping up the semester, this egregious behavior has continued.

Although multiple attempts to address this behavior have been implemented, the behavior continues. As a result, we will be closing the Hewitt 3 restroom starting today, and it will remain locked until Friday, April 5, 2013. Upon reopening the bathroom, should this disrespectful behavior persist, we will close the bathroom for a longer period of time.

To be clear, I would like to state what proper use of our restroom facilities should look like. Proper usage should include proper and complete flushing of the toilets, wiping down toilet seat should you soil it, disposing of all paper towels in the garbage bins, picking up and disposing any items that may have fallen to the floor, etc.

This action is clearly not something that we enjoy doing. We realize that this impacts everyone who lives on the 3rd floor, as now your bathrooms will be occupied more frequently by additional residents. I encourage you to speak to Omar Miranda, the Graduate Hall Director of Hewitt and Sulzberger Tower, and share any information that may help us understand who is behind these actions. Our hope is to provide support and assistance to the individual(s) responsible for this behavior; we cannot do that unless we know who this is. You can email Omar at or stop by his posted office hours in his office on the 2nd floor of Hewitt.

Many thanks.

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  1. CC '13  

    when I lived in Furnald, someone on my floor treated the women's restroom this way. I would regularly find shit smeared on the floor and toilet seat, period blood in the same places (and once on the WALL), and pee basically everywhere. it was fucking horrible. there was also only one stall. really makes you wonder what has to be going through someone's mind/bowels for that to happen...

    • Anonymous

      in one of the women's bathrooms in Butler, either on the 5th or 6th floor, some asshole thought it would be hilarious to put red paint on the floor under two of the toilets. i had a fucking heart attack.

      well played, whoever did that. well played.

  2. wtf  

    Well I'm sure all the prospies reading this are now all really excited to come to columbia. ಠ_ಠ But, seriously, wtf?

  3. Rejected.  

    I can only imagine what it's going to be like at Cornell. :(

  4. Tom Riddle  

    The chamber of secrets has been opened!

  5. Please...  

    we call that a Tuesday afternoon in Carmen.

  6. Just curious  

    Pix plz!

  7. Leslie ress

    They forgot to mention the fucking chewed gum all over the floor, in the stalls, and on the sink areas.

  8. Anonymous

    pix or it didnt happen

  9. Anonymous

    I can imagine how things could get dirty, and even if there's some stray pee happening, but FECES SMEARED is a whole other level. I'm just sorry for the non-feces-smearing folks who have to deal with this shit.

    (In other news, the bot-prevention text I have to enter is ITURDSTR.)

  10. wut

    in Sulz 7 last year, someone peed on the floor between the shower stall door and the shower ALL YEAR. AT LEAST PEE IN THE SHOWER FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!

  11. Robert  

    2 girls 1 cup gone bad

  12. anon  

    I think that we can all agree 3rd floor = barnyard

  13. hey psych majors  

    what goes through someone's head when they do something like this?

  14. What is a man doing in the women's restrooms?

    You know, cause girls don't poop.

  15. Hewitt 2nd floor  

    Please don't come and do the same thing on Hewitt 2 or Hewitt 4 now that you guys don't have a bathroom. That's gross!

  16. anon  

    i feel sorry for the kids in sulz 3 and brooks 3 who have to share bathrooms with whomever is filthying hewitt 3's bathroom.

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