The Hookup: McBain 9
Written by Bwog Staff
Yesterday’s post left us all hot and bothered day dreaming about a bed of pansies. Today we continue Bwog’s series on the best and worst spots to bang out a consensual quickie at Columbia. In this edition a Bwogger takes us on a journey to mythical McBain 9.
It’s late. You’re drunk. You’re not sure exactly how late it is, just that it’s late enough that neither of your roommates are responding to your “room n0w?? !ED?BHR/? [sashimi emoji] [finger pointing right emoji] [ “ok” hand emoji]” texts. You’re walking down Broadway unabashedly making out on the sidewalk as similarly plastered friends point and laugh and you shout back “it doesn’t say RSVP on the Statue of Liberty, dipshit!”
Finally you make it back to that safe haven of McBain—but still neither roommate has responded to your desperate texts. Next thing you know, you’re rushing up those famed Escher stairs. You pass both of your floors and you’re trying to figure out where you’re heading—did he get a key to that empty shaft room on the seventh floor?–once you reach the eighth floor. But then…you keep going up.
Where the fuck did this other floor come from? Are you imagining this? Did you just blackout and go into some crazy fucking hallucination dream? Is there just a ninth fucking floor of McBain that you never knew existed? Guess you never thought to look up the stairs from the eighth floor. Did you miscount the floors–is this still the eighth? Wait is this where, like, artists in residence live? Is this like in boarding school when the house mom has a secret room for her and her real family? Is this real life?? The lights are off up there so you can’t really get a good look around but then—why are you trying to get a good look around? You found an empty dark space. Who cares if this is a hallucination or not. Go forth, you crazy kids.
McBizzle via WikiCU
Tags: bwog just wants to be cosmo, hookup series, in case the roof is just too exposed, mcbain of thrones, more places you can go to not study, roommate avoidance strategies, watch out for echoing stairwells