Dec

18

Senior Wisdom: Daniella Greenbaum

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Half girl, half automobile
"DG"

“DG”

We’re back with another senior wisdom – this time, from everyone’s favorite Spec op-ed writer, Daniella Greenbaum. Find out where she’s been, where she’s going, and what advice she has.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Daniella Greenbaum, AKA “DG”, Barnard, English Lit, hometown, if you can call it that, is Manhattan

Claim to fame: Former Aryeh President. Spec Columnist. Also, at midnight on my 21st birthday, I was in Butler with a smirnoff ice, a slice of cake, and a paper that badly needed to be written. I’m absolutely terrified of dogs.

Where are you going? I’m starting as Commentary Magazine’s assistant editor in February! Subscribe!

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2020?

1. There is a cafe in the Hillel building on 115th. They sell Paninis. These Paninis will change your life. Go there. Daily.

2. True friends will stick with you when campus hates on you because they find something you wrote offensive. Go out of your way to write something that might be perceived as offensive so you can see who your true pals are. I’m kidding. But in all seriousness, the friends you make in college will be with you for the rest of your life. Treasure them.

3. If there’s a person who you think is brilliant who disagrees with you about something, it might be worthwhile to reconsider your own position. Don’t get so used to your own ideas that you stop thinking about them. Take classes that push you out of your comfort zone. Being “unsafe” and being “uncomfortable” are not the same. Challenge yourself. It’s why you’re here. Don’t assume that people who disagree with you are immoral or stupid. (Some of them might be.)

“Back in my day…” Barnard had a library, people didn’t talk about intersectionality in every waking moment, Orgo Night was fun and bitful, not a subject of politicized debate.

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: 600 was infested with mice, Barnard wasn’t super on top of the issue so I filed a complain with the NYC Department of Health and tagged them and Barnard in a tweet about the issue. The issue was resolved. Bottom line: If something crappy is happening, like your apartment being infested with rodents, USE YOUR VOICE. @speaking fellows I see you.

What was your favorite class at Columbia? This question is impossible to answer. A better question is “What were some of your favorite classes at Columbia” and my answer is: Contemporary Moral Problems with Phillip Kitcher, Romantic Poetry with Erik Gray, British Literature with Edward Mendelson, The Art of the Essay with Wendy Schor-Haim, Reacting to the Past with Carnes, the English Colloquium with Peter Platt. Bottom Line: Never take four classes a semester. This institution has so much to offer and it’s folly not to take advantage of that.

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? If Donald Trump had been nominated for senior wisdom and answered this question, his doubtlessly disgusting answer would have done absolutely zero to derail his candidacy. That’s pretty sad, no?

One thing to do before graduating: Everyone says sneak onto Butler roof. It’s not overrated. Do it. Do it soon. And if you’ve never gone to Orgo night, just do it. We’re all offended. You’ll be okay.

Any regrets? Not taking more philosophy classes, never attending Varsity show or Bachannal, getting a callback for Pizmon, the Jewish a capella group, and not showing up for it. Being so obsessed with the fact that I once got a callback for an a capella group that I needed to somehow squeeze it into this questionnaire.

Photo via Daniella Greenbaum

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9 Comments

  1. The real Daniella Judith Greenbaum

    I didn't write that comment^

  2. Arnold Peylinger

    Daniella Greenbaum is a bot who never existed. This Senior Wisdom is fake and you all are fools for reading it

  3. Anonymous

    ok but wheres your secret hotlink

  4. Jeremy Sacks

    I'm a little insulted you didn't answer the oral sex/cheese q.

  5. arafat

    something something PALESTINIANS something something. something something more OBAMA something something TERROR something something

  6. CU Admirer

    Daniella, roses are red violets are blue...dammit forgot you don't see color.

  7. Anon

    Only real reference to Israel being Cafe Nana is the upset of the century...don't hate it

  8. Anonymous

    "people didn’t talk about intersectionality in every waking moment"

    How non-intersectional of you. This statement is the worst thing to ever happen to anyone.

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