Daily Archive: September 4, 2017

Sep

4

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img September 04, 20177:06 pmimg 0 Comments

Everything must go!

As we saw over the summer, Columbia Spectator departed from their flagship 111th street location. All that Spec and no where to park it! We put together a list of potential properties we think they should look into:

Lerner Party Space: The shitty wifi would allow the staff to literally and figuratively disconnect. Plus, good vibes from the sorority chapter meetings and occasional Dollarama held there will linger, lifting their spirits.

Low Library: So they can be even closer to the administration. Kissing ass from six blocks away can be difficult at times!

EC Air Shaft: While there is a lack of natural light, this would be a great space for them to at least create an interesting story.

Carman Stairwell: For some privacy ;)

Teachers College Basement: The Teacher’s College Basement has plenty of space and is conveniently located near Joe Coffee. Also, they could fall into a temporal wormhole.

A McBain Double: McBain offers an intimate setting for writing and creativity. Great walls for hanging posters.

Riverside Park: Will attract a hipper, younger crowd. Doesn’t smell THAT bad. Really nice view of the Westside Highway.

John Jay LoungeSo they won’t have to wake up at 6 am to beat us to the better couch during housing selection.

John Jay Dining Hall: The abundance of seating space would allow them to host useful parties, celebrating the useful opeds they keep putting up.

John Jay’s Place: They could save money on food and spend it on something decent – maybe some Fuck Bwog stickers?

Sep

4

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img September 04, 20174:47 pmimg 4 Comments

Everyone, you need to stop what you’re doing right now and look at this.

Yes. That is right. Carman has been renovated. WE REPEAT. CARMAN HAS BEEN RENOVATED. It’s only the top three floors so far, but no doubt the lower floors will follow suit.

This is a disaster. Carman isn’t Carman if Carman is nice. The Carman identity is that it’s gross and covered in vomit with used condoms lying around in the stairwells. Renovated Carman isn’t true Carman. This isn’t fair. Every freshman should have the opportunity to experience Carman in its full disgusting glory. Columbia can’t take that quintessential Carman experience away from them. Another evil ploy by the evil administration. Also why the fuck are there 10-person suites? Whose idea was that? Thanks, Obama (CC ’83).

Carman Nonsense via Youngweon Lee

Sep

4

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img September 04, 201710:03 amimg 1 Comments

I am a good Columbia boy!

HEADS UP: TODAY IS THE ECOREPS GREEN SALE!! 9 am-4 pm in the Wien Lounge!! Go get that mini fridge!!!!!

Happening in the world: While it remains unconfirmed that North Korea set off a hydrogen bomb, experts from China and South Korea said that the explosion caused an underground blast that is four to sixteen times more powerful than the ones that the North had set off before. (The NY Times)

Happening in the nation:  In response to Trump’s readiness to scrap DACA, a small but growing number of Republicans, including House Speaker Paul Ryan, are pushing back against the president and seeking to come up with a “comprehensive legislative solution.” (BBC)

Happening in NYC: The West Indian Parade, a seven-hour New York carnival with steel-pan and calypso bands in elaborate costumes marching down Eastern Parkway, is happening today starting from 11 am at the Brooklyn Museum. (Timeout)

Happening on campus: “Art of “Whose” People,” an art exhibition curated by Yasi Fetrati, will be on display from Sep 5th to Sep 29th at the Leroy Neiman Gallery. It is said to “tackle politics on its edge, where nation is merely a narrative, the utopia of humanist Globalism is corrupted by market, and the ultimate audience, the “people,” is a question.”

WELCOME TO COLUMBIA, first-years! Persist like Liza Minnelli–it may not necessarily be pretty, but it is admirable!

 

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