Field Notes: Keep It In Your Pants Edition

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A Snapchat of two people making out in a public lounge chair at 3:18 am.
A Snapchat of two people making out in a public lounge chair at 3:18 am.

Just you wait ’til the RA hears about this!

So there you are, at three in the morning on Saturday. You just had a great time getting covered in glitter in a Brownstone, and now you’re back in Furnald. But your roommate is asleep! You decide to be courteous and dry hump your compatriot in the public lounge. This is not courteous. Do not do this. If you see this, please send it to  What we did wasn’t quite so debaucherous:

Food and Drink Rule Everything Around Us

  • Used a JJ’s swipe for just the smoothies at the Cool Zone.
  • Walked to 79th and back to get ice cream.
  • A waiter accidentally charged me the price for a non-spiked milkshake. Rejoiced.
  • Cooked cabbage soup for first time for my sick girlfriend.
  • Went apple-picking.
  • Spent over $100 on a single meal downtown.
  • Finessed my way through being carded at a fancy restaurant by pretending i knew something about wine.

Frats and Parties and Frats and Parties

  • Hooked up with a boy while sick, got him sick, got better, hooked up with him again, got sick again.
  • Talked about the meaning of human existence with frat boys.
  • Got a little too drunk on Friday, ended up hooking up with 2 different guys at 2 different parties.
  • Did not go to one single frat party the whole weekend and honestly felt great about it.
  • Went to The Meadows! Got my bowl taken away by security.
  • Pregamed for The Meadows on the 7 train. Ended up drunk, sweaty, and ambitious enough to dance to every Weezer and Red Hot Chili Peppers song played.

High Culture, High Society

  • Spent one-quarter of my summer earnings at J.Crew to get clothes for an interview I was later rejected at.
  • Got rejected at a dance audition for the thousandth time.
  • Walked to 70th and back to go the Frick.
  • Went to the Cloisters and found out that Inwood Hill Park is essentially the most perfect/beautiful place to smoke on Manhattan.
  • Was the youngest person/only undergrad at a ~networking event~; got more excited about the free booze than the actual networking opportunities.

Taking Care of Ourselves

  • Ran up 18 flights of stairs in EC to avoid a crowded elevator.
  • Went on a very wholesome retreat and made new friends.
  • Went to K-Town, didn’t get drunk.
  • Made it to my Friday 9 am seminar early after a Thursday night out.

We Hope You Didn’t Fall Down the Stairs, Too

  • Fell down the stairs in my brownstone and almost broke my tailbone. ended up in the ER for four hours.
  • Went on a tinder date for the first time in months, and it actually went great.
  • Told a guy who came over at 4 am that I didn’t want to kiss him and somehow offended him.
  • Got woken up at 2 am by my roommate’s boyfriend begging to be let in so he could grab his stuff and leave. The next morning, though, he was there sleeping with my roommate.
  • Found out my computer that I hate beyond compare was bought while I was in middle school.
  • Somehow managed to spill wine on the seat of my shorts.
  • Hand-delivered printed copies of a fanfiction I wrote about my favorite musical to the actors in said musical.

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