Daily Archive: November 11, 2017

Nov

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Peter V. Johnson

Admissions officer and 35-year Columbia employee Peter V. Johnson has passed away.

Most recently, Johnson worked as a special assistant to the dean of Undergraduate Admissions and Financial Aid. But beyond admissions, students knew Johnson as a mentor, as an athletic liaison for the Lions, and as “the kind gentleman with the bowtie who would patiently answer question after question,” according to a Columbia statement issued Friday.

In 2016, Johnson was honored with the Black Alumni Council Heritage Award, which awards individuals in the Columbia community who have made considerable contributions in their fields and in the school as a whole. During his acceptance speech, Johnson said about Columbia: “My 33 years here have been A Love Supreme. You have challenged me, taught me, supported me, proven to me that this is the best college in the world.”

We offer our condolences. Columbia has stated that details are forthcoming about a memorial honoring Peter’s life.

Photo via Columbia College

Nov

11

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Kendall and Kylie. Ice cream and apple pie. John Jay Dining Hall and…beans. While these pairings might be merely well-known, perhaps the most iconic duo of all time is the Butler stacks and sex. Goddamnit y’all. How many articles do we have to write until you stop having sex in the stacks? Bwogger Maggie explores some of the boner killers you crazy kids might face if you attempt stacks sex.

Sex in Butler is a rite of passage everyone is no doubt familiar with, some of us more intimately than others. But this phenomenon is one that happens spontaneously, making it easy to forgo attention to detail. Ideally, though, you want to strut past the circulation desk post-coitus like you just got out of a take-back-your-life seminar, not a disappointing and physically strenuous acrobatic feat. If you want your experience to be really special, you should take the time to make sure you don’t run into any of these:

Here’s some recommended reading for all you stacks-loving nymphos.

  • A nearby student suffering from a persistent coughing fit. If you’re the kind of person who’s getting kinky in the stacks, odds are you already have little regard for those around you, so the abrupt reminder that they exist is a sure-fire way to kill the mood. It might be a good idea to have some over-the-counter medications to offer your disrespectfully noisy peers.
  • David Foster Wallace’s Infinite Jest. If only we, as a society, could harness the power of the erections that CC boys have about this 1079-page behemoth. Picture this: things are getting steamy in the Soviet history aisle (located on level 3 for everyone who likes doing it on bottom). In the heat of the moment, you don’t realize the shelves being violently shaken. A copy of Infinite Jest falls from above and, even in the instant before climax, your partner can’t resist mansplaining why you should read it.
  • Automatic lights. The illicit nature of stacks sex is probably what makes it most appealing, so lifting the shroud of darkness will definitely ruin the magic of your tryst.
  • Dirty talk. This environment is not conducive to a baby-making Spotify playlist, so you can forget that Mariah Carey or Marvin Gaye to set the mood. Perhaps, you might think, dirty talk is a safer alternative. You would be wrong. The looks you get for a simple sneeze are dirty enough, so any volume of speech above total silence is off the table.
  • People who actually need the books you’re having sex on. Even when you think you’ve done everything to ensure your rendez-vous will go as smoothly as possible, there are some things you just can’t predict. Who could have known someone would need to look at that Church periodical you’re defiling?

If you can be sure none of these things will get in your way, get your freak on! Just kidding. Although we here at Bwog are sex-positive hedonists, the furthest you should indulge your dreams of library sex is a viewing of The Prince and Me.

Nov

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You, screaming with joy after reading this list of exciting new classes to take this spring!

 

Spring registration starts *gasp* Monday. If you’ve been frantically checking CULPA slash Vergil slash EZACU, look no further. Here are Bwog’s top picks for classes to take this spring. Feel free to leave your own recommendations in the comments!

Art History: Jonathan Reynolds, Modern Japanese Architecture

“Don’t let the heavy reading load or 4000-level course number scare you – the course is totally doable with no prior art history knowledge, and Prof. Reynolds is one of the nicest and most interesting professors I’ve ever had.  Basically, take this if you’re a weeb.”

Biology: Hilary Callahan, Plants and Profits: The Global Power of Botany

“Professor Hilary Callahan (the Barnard bio department’s resident plant lady) is teaching a really cool new lecture/lab class on plant conservation that’s going to involve trips to the NY Botanical Garden!”

Core/English: Austin Graham, The 1960s; Lit Hum

“Take anything by Professor Thomas Austin Graham. He is an amazing professor; I had him for Lit Hum and miss him very much.”

Wow, thanks Bwog! What else should I take this spring?

Nov

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Heads-up: no photos or videos are allowed during the performances! If you want a visual of the play, the 7 pm showtime still has tickets available for purchase.

Tired of huddling in your room, bemoaning the chilly weather? This weekend, CU Players is presenting a production of The Caucasian Chalk Circle, a play that explores the theme of family through a dynamic group of characters in even-chillier Russia. Bwog baby Zoe Metcalfe went to check it out.

The Caucasian Chalk Circle (set in the Caucasus Mountains, not just about white people), is the story of a peasant girl who rescues and raises a baby from a powerful and wealthy family, after his father is killed and his mother abandons him amidst a violent rebellion. The cast is made up of only seven actors, but together, they play a total of 49 disparate characters. While it seems like so many characters and so few actors could make the action hard to follow, the ability of the actors and the strength of the costume designing combine well to clearly delineate the different characters, without much confusion. The actors shouldered this heavy burden well, skillfully adapting to each new character, adopting new mannerisms and ticks in each new scene that become even more entertaining as the play progresses.
So…is there actual chalk at the performance?

Nov

11

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This could be you!

Happening in the World: In South Indian city Hyderabad, police have begun an unprecedented sweep to get beggars off the streets, in preparation for Ivanka Trump’s visit later this month. (CNN)

Happening in the US: Comedian Louis C.K. admitted in a Friday statement to accusations that he had participated in sexual misconduct with several women, leading groups such as FX, HBO, and Netflix to further cut ties with him. (NYT)

Happening in NYC: If you’ve ever wanted to have Breakfast At Tiffany’s, Tiffany & Co.’s flagship Fifth Avenue location has opened a new restaurant that, yes, serves breakfast, for $29. The restaurant, Blue Box Cafe, features decor in the store’s signature blue hue. (Newsday)

Happening on Campus: Just in time for those wintry Instagram posts, Columbia University Photography Society is offering a 2 pm workshop on how to take better portraits “with different styles and effects.” The workshop will meet at the corner of Seminary Row and Riverside Drive, according to its Facebook event here.

Audrey Hepburn via Kristine/Flickr under CC-by-NC 2.0

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