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Apr

10

Worst Places To Stand On Campus, Ranked

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The stairs aren’t here for your photoshoots.

The beauty of Columbia’s spacious campus is that there are a ton of convenient, non-intrusive places to stand. Clearly, a lot of people haven’t gotten that memo, so for those people, here’s a ranking of the worst places to stand on campus.

  1. In the hallway connecting the food area with the seating area in JJ’s. That hallway is very narrow and can only accommodate a few things. Standing is not one of those said things.
  2. Hamilton stairwell. We are all either late to class, or we’re trying to leave run away from it as soon as possible. Please do not stand here. Please.
  3. In front of the stairs/drink dispenser in Ferris. Let us get our freakin’ orange juice in peace!
  4. The middle of the NoCo escalator. Escalator etiquette is simple – stand to the right side if you’re not moving, walk up the left side if you are.
  5. The walkways around Lewisohn and Math. The Bwogger who compiled this ranking is not a STEM major, b
  6. The stairs between the Diana/Altschul and Milbank.  See #2.
  7. Next to the ATM in Barnard hall. Standing here gives us the feeling that you’re memorizing PIN numbers.
  8. More generally, anywhere in John Jay/Ferris that isn’t the line. If you aren’t actively getting food or moving, you are what’s wrong with the dining halls.

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