Opening Remarks
Not your Music Hum professor

Won’t you stay in your 8:40???

Though we’re still well in to the Shopping Period, some professors have gone above and beyond to accomplish a rewarding retention rate for the first week of classes by making you feel welcome/uncomfortable/curious where the line between student and professor stands. Whatever the intention or the response, we’ve compiled some of the best memories from Spring 2015’s first week of classes with professors who need a full lecture hall for personal validation. 

Edward Mendelson

“[PrezBo] was taken over by Martians 15 years ago.”

Homa Zarghamee, Economics of Gender

“Unfortunately you can’t really pick a husband off a menu.”

Brendan O’Flaherty, Principles of Economics

“I could be at home playing with my cats.  I’m here because I’m getting paid.”

 Gareth Williams, Intermediate Latin II

“Ovid is the closest you will find in the Roman literary canon to Belgian chocolate.”

The Real MVPs

Not your Music Hum professor via Shutterstock

Announcing New CC/SEAS Dean Of Undergraduate Student Life

shutterstock_56365900It was announced today at 2pm that Cristen Kromm is to be the new CC/SEAS Dean of Undergraduate Student Life. Kromm is replacing interim CC/SEAS Dean of Undergraduate Student Life Todd Smith-Bergolio, a position he has held since Columbia began their search last summer for a new Dean once Dean Martinez left us for Johns Hopkins. We are thrilled to welcome Dean Kromm into her new position.

Press release for Dean Kromm can be found below.

Columbia College and The Fu Foundation School of Engineering and Applied Science Announce new Dean of Undergraduate Student Life

Cristen Scully Kromm has been appointed Dean of Undergraduate Student Life for Columbia  College and The Fu Foundation School of Engineering and Applied Science, effective Feb. 1, 2015.

Kromm currently serves as Associate Dean of Residential Life for Columbia College and The Fu Foundation School of Engineering and Applied Science, where she is responsible for residential life within the College and Engineering and is actively involved in the co-curricular life of students. Kromm has worked closely with students and partners throughout the University to develop programs such as Responsible Community @ Columbia (RC@C), a peer-facilitated conversation about alcohol and drugs during NSOP (in collaboration with Alice! Health Promotion), and the popular “Puppy Coalition” study break during finals (in collaboration with students). She has collaborated with Athletics, Fraternity and Sorority Life, and Student Engagement to ensure consistency in hazing prevention education across student groups, and with Housing and Facilities to create the Production Advisory Board, which gives students an opportunity to provide direct feedback about residence hall conditions.

More on the press release after the jump

Gear Up For Bacchanal Battle Of The Bands 2015

Want to leave an equally infamous Bacchanal legacy as that of Fountain Girl & Co? Have something to brag to your kids about when you speak of the college wonder years by submitting a sample of your very on music to the Bacchanal Committee to put you in the running to start off the one day a year Columbia kids get drunk before nightfall. The deadline is Friday, February 13th at 11:59 pm so start assembling your broken up band/suitemates and get back in the zone of dropping some sick beats together (or solo). Battle of the Bands will be held on February 27th at 7:30pm.

For more information, refer to the Facebook event and pirate a copy of School of Rock to re-familiarize yourself with the millennial’s dogma on how to rock.

CCSC Learns About Step Up Bystander Intervention
step-up-logo

CCSC members are leaders makin’ a difference!

Campus politics guru Joe Milholland is back with the latest CCSC report; last night CCSC designated their first meeting of Spring 2015 to discuss next steps in the Step Up program on our campus. [Trigger warning: post mentions terms and topics related to sexual assault.] 

In their first general body meeting of the semester, the Columbia College Student Council dedicated their entire meeting to witnessing and responding to a presentation from Sexual Violence Response (SVR) prevention coordinator Paul Carbini on the Step Up program. The Step Up program is bystander intervention education that is used by colleges and organizations across the nation to prevent sexual assault.

Council members generally approved of the presentation. CCSC President Peter Bailinson will be meeting with groups in coming weeks to encourage the groups to go through with bystander intervention training. 2016 Class Council Vice President Anne Scotti mentioned that she has experienced Step Up training before and found it beneficial.

“For sexual assault, most of the sequence happens in public – at parties, at bars, in the dorms,” said Carbini as he explained the need for bystander intervention. The goal of Step-up is to transform bystanders, who do not intervene, into pro-social bystanders, who do intervene. Carbini said that the steps of intervention were to notice what’s happening, interpret it, assume personal responsibility, know how to help, and then intervene.

Carbini then went through the intervention process. People often do not interpret certain actions as red flags because of situational ambiguity or conformity. Students can improve their interpretation by asking others and investigating ambiguous events further. Furthermore, in large groups, diffusion of responsibility can cause nobody to intervene because everyone assumes someone else will intervene.

More on what Step Up has to offer after the jump.

Bwoglines: Throwdown For Your College Town Edition
shutterstock_127037534

Luv for the 1

Murmurs around campus that classes might be canceled on Tuesday to surrender to the impending massive snowfall now have a little more leverage. Will PrezBo prepare us as well as de Blasio plans to prepare his constituents? (NY Times)

Looking for an alternative to have on call when someone in your lottery group kicks you out of the dream deal? Here’s to hoping you win the lottery so you can live away from your ex-roomies-to-be in actual New Yorker style that says, “shouldn’t have picked to pull in your little over me, bitch.” (Curbed)

If one of your quickly disappearing remaining new year’s resolutions was to get more cultural, prove to everyone that you’re really striving for “new year new you” by doing your research before trekking down to Lincoln Center. (HuffPo)

Plans for Port Authority offering similar capitalist ventures via a more elaborate retail market comparable to counterparts Grand Central and Penn Station are in the works; but Port Authority, in your expansive connections to the tristate area and beyond, will always be grungy in our “true New Yorker” hubristic hearts. (WSJ)

Acting like you leave campus via Shutterstock

 

Advice From A Crusty Alumnus

This afternoon we received an email from a self-titled “rapidly crusting alum,” who has imparted some special words of counsel. With a full Spring semester ahead, we share this timely letter.

To: tips@bwog.com
From: Anonymous
Subject: Crusty alum advice

Hi Bwog,

I am a rapidly-crusting alum writing you from the office. And at the start of this spring semester I have some advice I was hoping you’d run as an open letter. It’s brief. Here goes.

It is the spring of ’15, you have 0.5-3.5 years of college left. During those remaining years, strive to “hold fast to the spirit of youth.” By which I mean do two things as much as is possible and responsible for you: get laid as much as you can and read as much as you can.

Tell me more, crusty one…

The Blue And White Needs Techies!
The Blue And White Wants You!

The Blue And White Wants You!

Attention! Are you good at website design or coding? Interested in online illustration? Trying to find an extra-curricular to fill the gap of that four point class you just dropped?

The Blue And White, also known as our parent in print-form, is Columbia’s monthly undergraduate magazine. The magazine is looking for people to assist with website tech.

Students interested in joining can visit their website, FacebookTwitter, or email editors@theblueandwhite.org for more information!

 

Columbia-themed political propaganda via Shutterstock

Bwog Meeting Tonight—Join Us!
Our faithful defender of all things good

Our faithful defender of all things good

The world is full of three two types of people: the good and the bad and the ugly. At Columbia, we know that those people are Bwog and Spec and the Lion.

There will be a time in everyone’s life when they must choose between white wine or red the light and the dark. That day is today.

Join us tonight at 7PM in the SGO on the 5th floor of Lerner at Bwog’s first meeting of the year! Snacks and beverages will be provided. All are welcome to attend!

 

Taylor Skywalker via FaceInHole

Bucketlist: Art, Poetry, And Hip-Hop

Bucket List represents the intellectual privilege we enjoy as Columbia students. Welcome to our first Bucket List of the Spring Semester! Our recommendations for this week are below and the full list is after the jump. If you notice any events that have been left off the list, or a correction, please leave them in the comments.

Recommended

  • “Black Odysseys: Artists in Conversation” Low Library. Wednesday January 28, 6:30-8:30 PM. Elizabeth Alexander, Marilyn Nelson, Rowan Ricardo Philips. Registration Required.
  • “The Nonfiction Dialogues: Wayne Koestenbaum” Room 501 Dodge. Wednesday January 28, 7:00 PM.
  • “Exhibit Opening: The Dreamer from the Northern Lights” IAB Harriman Atrium. Thursday January 29, 6:00-8:00 PM. Andrey Bartenev, Natasha Sharymova.
  • “The Cultural Politics of French Hip-Hop” Buell Hall East Gallery. Thursday January 29, 6:00-7:30 PM. Felicia McCarren, Barbara Browning, Madeleine Dobie.

Monday, January 26

  • “What’s Next? The Ukraine Crisis in the Global Context.” IAB 1501, 5:00-7:00 PM. Alexander Cooley, Valery Kuchinsky, Kimberly Marten, Jack Snyder.
  • “The Politics of Russian and Western Responses to Refugee Displacement from Eastern Ukraine” Sulzberger Parlor, 6 PM. Raphi Rechitsky.
  • “Whose Modernism? El Greco and Art’s History.” 612 Schermerhorn, 6:00-8:00 PM. Charles Barber.
  • “Film Screening: The Unvanquished.” IAB 1219. 7:30-9:30 PM.

Tuesday, January 27

  • “How to Run for an Office: the Art of Campaigning.” IAB 1201, 1:15-2:30 PM. Anna Matukova.
  • “Front Propagation in Population Dynamics and Combustion” Applied Mathematics Colloquium. Mudd 214, 2:45-3:45 PM. Christopher Henderson.
  • “Book Talk: Whither the World: the Political Economy of the Future.” IAB 1512, 5:00-6:30 PM. Grezegorz Kolodko.
  • “M.S. in Sustainability Management Information Session.” Faculty House, 6:30-8:00 PM.

Read more after the jump!

Weekend Sports Wrap: An Evening Of Missed Opportunities
Looking for the open shot

Looking for the open shot

Aspiring sports journalists Ross Chapman and Max Rettig bring you the latest coverage of all things basketball (and other sporting festivities).

Preseason Ivy League basketball favorite Harvard fell to Dartmouth yesterday, 61-70. 2013-14 runner-up Yale only barely beat Brown, 69-65. And Columbia found itself in a position to change the Ivy landscape and assert itself as a major contender for the conference title. A win against Cornell would have put the Lions at 2-0, in front of the Crimson and tied with the Bulldogs, ahead of a crucial showdown next week. But the Lions couldn’t shake their shooting demons and lost to the Big Red, 47-57, squandering a huge chance to control their own destiny in an Ivy season in which every game matters.

The Lions led for much of the first 20 minutes, but never comfortably. After about 14 minutes, Cornell got its first lead at 18-17. Then, in the waning minutes of the half, first-year Kyle Castlin notched a fast five to put Columbia back in front, 23-21. But Cornell’s Dave LaMore netted a buzzer-beater tip-in on a ball that was about to roll out, and the Big Red led 27-25 as the college players left the court and the pee-wee players took over as halftime entertainment.

The Lions were within easy striking distance—a trey would put them ahead. Then they got shut down by a high-pressure Cornell defense for the first seven minutes of the second half. Maodo Lo ended that drought, but Columbia’s offense stagnated again shortly thereafter. Shonn Miller and Co. charged ahead with under five minutes on the clock to put the Lions in as much as a 13-point hole they would not climb out of, gaining only three more points the rest of the way.

While they hung right with Cornell for the first half, the Lions shot a meager 27 percent from the floor in the second half, a result of poor shot choices and conservative play. Several potential breakaway opportunities ended when the Lions held on for too long and allowed all of the Big Red defenders to get in position. Usually a mild scoring threat at best, Isaac Cohen led the Lions’ effort with 13 points on 6-10 shooting, and senior center Cory Osetkowski collected 13 boards, a game-high total. Maodo Lo again was tamed. For Cornell, who shot close to 45 percent, Shonn Miller excelled, notching 18 points, nine rebounds and four of Cornell’s nine blocks. Galal Cancer added 16 points on 7-of-12 from the floor.

On a night when Cornell remedied its mistakes from last week’s slopfest, Columbia simply did not. The Lions still shot abysmally (32.8% on the game), Maodo Lo couldn’t get started (11 points, 3 fouls), and the offense again fell victim to a high-pressure, in-your-face defense, a trend the Lions will have to buck if they hope to meet, or surpass, their high expectations from last season. Though they squandered a critical opportunity to join Yale at the top of the standings, the Lions (9-7, 1-1) are still only one game back of the Bulldogs. This makes the Lions’ next matchup against Yale on Friday at 8 pm in Levien Gym especially important. A Columbia win would even out Columbia and Yale (and probably Harvard) as Ivy leaders at 2-1. If you can’t make it out to Levien to jeer at the Elis, you can catch the game on TV on SNY or on the air at WKCR 89.9 FM.

But Columbia still found ways to win yesterday…

Bwoglines: Shocking Edition
Bwoglines so shocking it's like 19,000,000 V to the chest

Bwoglines so shocking it’s like 19,000,000 V to the chest

If you’ve been anxiously awaiting RiRi’s new album like the rest of us, get ready for the highlight of your month: Rihanna, Paul McCartney, and Kanye West on a new track titled “FourFiveSeconds.” (EOnline)

Is it possible there might be a ninth tenth ninth planet out there between Mars and Jupiter? We’re about to find out. This March, a small robot named “Dawn” will land on the asteroid Ceres, an asteroid that is also quite small, for the first time ever. (Popular Science)

“Ban guns! Give everyone tasers and mace!” yelled the north-easterners seeking a less-lethal tactic to stopping crime. Apparently they were wrong. Turns out tasers are just as lethal as guns. (Star Tribune)

Is it possible everyone’s favorite mile-high publication is going out of business? According to the interwebs, SkyMall has just filed for bankruptcy, ending its monopolistic reign of literature available to travelers in the sky. (The Verge)

Shock the world via Shutterstock

Overheard: Dinner Plans
Happily wondering where his next meal is coming from

Happily wondering where his next meal is coming from

A tipster overheard the following exchange between two students in line for an advising appointment:

Junior: What year are you?
Senior:
Senior
J:
Where you trying to go after this?
S:
Oh, uh, John Jay I guess.
J:
For what?
S:
For…dinner?

 

 

 

Blissful shortsightedness via Shutterstock

CUSS With Us

Are you a talented, shining star? Have you ever wanted to go catfishing in Butler or get drunk on a piano? Is getting lost in the Teacher’s College or wearing a giant pumpkin head up your alley? If you’re enthusiastically nodding right now, today is your lucky day!

CUSS (Columbia’s only Bwog’s favorite video sketch group) is looking for comic actors to join its talented ensemble. Auditions will be held tomorrow (Sunday, Jan 25) in Hamilton from 6-9. Signs with the exact room number will be posted in the Hamilton Lobby on the day of auditions. Come prepared with a comedic monologue of your choosing (2 mins or less) or read from one of the sides provided.

CUSS Season 1 Trailer from Bwog on Vimeo.

More questions? Check out the Facebook event or email video@bwog.com for more info.

Nobody Asked Tats: Recruitment Edition
A "candid," as the youths call it.

A “candid,” as the youths call it.

Need bad advice? Interested in seeing your life go up in flames and down the drain? Never fear — our trusty editor Tatini Mal-Sarkar is here to save you from yourself your worst nightmare. Notorious for poor life choices, who better to guide you through the trials and tribulations of the college years? This session, we bring you our handy-dandy guide to that timeless question that likely had even Aristotle scratching his head: what should I wear for rush?

Dear Tats,

Literally all I have ever wanted in this life is to be a sorority girl – or a srat, as they are colloquially known. Next week is rush recruitment, and I’m quivering in my boots at the prospect of impressing a room full of beautiful, polished young women. Such gleaming, styled locks of hair! So many statement accessories! So much coral! So tell me, dear Tats, o proprietor of savory fashion advice, what exactly should I wear for this most perilous of events?

Sincerely, What’s Wrong With Bodycon?

More, more, more!

Bwoglines: New Millennium Edition
Leap into something new

Leap into something new.

The National Institutes of Health awarded Columbia Professor Karolynn Siegel and her team $432,000 over two years to study participants’ arousal when using gay hookup apps like Grindr. (The Washington Free Beacon)

Airline staple SkyMall‘s parent company, Xhibit, has filed for bankruptcy. The firm blames the popularity of electronics for its rapidly declining sales figures. The magazine’s biggest creditors are, strangely, Delta and American Airlines; you’d think they’d have seen this coming. (USA Today)

The Jamaican senate is about to consider a bill to drastically relax the nation’s marijuana laws. The bill would decriminalize possession up to two ounces and legalize its use for medicinal and religious (i.e., Rastafarian) purposes, as well as open the doors for the creation of a legal ganja farming industry. (Guardian)

Meanwhile, President Obama said that he expects states to continue to experiment with marijuana legalization and that the federal government will try to stay out of their way. (Washington Post)

The source of a strange blue glow that appeared in the ocean near Hong Kong has been identified as Noctiluca scintillans, a toxic and destructive organism that reproduces rapidly when it comes in contact with farm runoff. At least we have pretty pictures. (AP via National Post)

The march of life via Shutterstock