May

6

Written by

Ally Engelberg

Ally Engelberg

Here is our second senior wisdom of the day, brought to you by Barnard senior Ally Engelberg.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Ally Engelberg, Barnard, American Studies/Film Studies double major, Lexington, Massachusetts (yes, home of the Shot Heard ‘Round the World, the Battle of Lexington and Concord, “the Redcoats are coming,” Paul Revere— you know the drill).

Claim to fame: Producer of The 119th and 120th Annual Varsity Shows, Vice President of the CU Performing Arts League, the girl who changed the name of SDT’s talent show benefitting Prevent Child Abuse America from “Greek Beats” to “Quest for the BeSDT,” and permanent resident of the Lerner 5 and Lerner 7 administrative offices (s/o to Vicky Zabriskie and Rodney Mirabal for being my ride or die clique for four years).

Where are you going? Nowhere, ever.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2019?

  1. Use Google Drive, because it means that you’re collaborating and making stuff with your peers. Sophomore year, two friends and I (whom I had JUST met) decided to write a full length parody of a musical in three days and it’s one of the best Google Docs in my Drive because to me it signifies the start of our wacky friendship. Someone also once told me that my meticulously organized Google Drive was hot, so I guess that’s a perk too. As a total aside, you know who you are, I’m ready to marry you please.
  2. Stay friends. I have found myself lucky beyond belief to have people in my life who’d travel for me, drink with me, and create with me at a moment’s notice, maybe less. They’re going abroad? They graduated? They’re interning in Tennessee this summer? Keep in touch because it matters. Your peers at Columbia will be people you’ll still want to know when you’re 75. So pick up the phone and make plans. Now, do it now.
  3. Notes of appreciation go a long way. To friends, professors, administrators, advisors— anyone who’s working hard for you, and there are usually tons of those people at any given time. Actually take a pen and paper and physically write down a sincere thank you. People keep those notes forever; I do. And yes, I am already your Jewish mother.

More wise advice after the jump…

May

6

Written by

Bound to give you a horrible hangover in the morning

Bound to give you a horrible hangover in the morning

Ah, Cinco de Mayo, the favorite holiday of frats/srats and other cultural appropriators everywhere. Here’s what some Columbia students did on the holiday/the first day of reading week.

  • Went into a fit of rage at Amigo’s after not getting seated 45 minutes after my RESERVATION TIME. Went to the Heights where I had some good margs. Drunkenly twerked to Shania Twain.
  • Went to Amigo’s (with previous Bwogger). It was packed (as expected), but we had a reservation and still weren’t seated like 40 minutes later. The hostess was just super stressed out, and literally walked out of the restaurant. lol
  • I actually did go to the midnight breakfast at the church. I also got tickets to Spec dinner WHICH I FOREWENT FOR MIDNIGHT BREAKFAST.
  • Went to Beta formal. Fell and skinned my knees before even getting into the cab to go to the venue. Went back to my room afterward, and a random brother (who had accompanied my suitemate back) had locked himself in my bathroom and passed out.
  • Got drunk-called by someone at the Beta formal. Closed my window in anticipation of the Circle of Life.
  • Got caught up on The Wicked + The Divine which is SUCH A GOOD SERIES HOLY SHIT. In other news, I’m going to get back into comics over the summer since I stopped keeping up halfway through February.
  • Spent a lot of my day trying to track down a lost check. Turns out my boss lost my timesheet. The HR person I talked to said I had a cool UNI, though.
  • Woke up drunk. Had a special night with my new rice cooker (the fucker does meat, vegetables, and rice at the same time). Went to bed just shy of ten.

Margz via Shutterstock

May

6

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Not only is it finals time, but it’s also allergy season (which could perhaps be stylized as ALLERGY SZN). This playlist below will get you through your pollen-related woes, and perhaps may help you to focus in and study a little bit, too.

  1. Machine Gun by Slowdive - A song to listen to as you drown in pollen on your walk back from NoCo.
  2. Champagne Coast by Blood Orange - Retreat back into your dorm room away from allergens as Dev Hynes croons, “Come into my bedroom.”
  3. Worst Behavior by Drake - Benadryl has got us on our worst behavior.
  4. Drinks On Us by Mike Will Made It, The Weeknd, Swae Lee, and Future - The Weeknd says when there’s “no white inside [one’s] eyes” that “it’s a fun day,” but we know otherwise. Make sure to get your medicated eye drops.
  5. Dance Yrself Clean by LCD Soundsystem - Take a shower and breathe again.
  6. Loft Music by The Weeknd - We also “seem to have 20 different pills” in us, but that’s because we take that many allergy medications.
  7. Gimme Sympathy by Metric - We’re NOT crying because we’re upset, we promise!!
  8. Sutphin Boulevard by Blood Orange - Pretend that you can breathe through your nose, and power through your work in the But with this song.
  9. Star67 by Drake - See above.
  10. Nothing But Time by Metric - When will it be time to stop taking Zyrtec every day?
  11. Let It Happen by Tame Impala - Go with the flow (of the waves of pollen).
  12. House Of Balloons/Glass Table Girls by The Weeknd - “If it hurts to breathe, open a window” is probably not the best advice when it comes to allergies, but anyway, this song is great.
  13. 40 Days by Slowdive - See “Nothing But Time.” But really, allergy season will be over (kind of) soon.

May

6

Written by

Katherina

Katherina Barguil

As finals approach, we’re rolling out even more senior wisdoms. Today, we bring you wisdom from SEAS student Katherina Barguil.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Katherina Barguil; SEAS; Civil Engineering (Water Resources); Cartagena, Colombia

Claim to fame: Once smuggled 40 bananas out of John Jay at a single dinner; I am also the person who caused the burn mark on the table in Hartley 8C (it was the first birthday for a friend I celebrated here); the big one though is probably being known as the RA of Wallach 9, the floor with the piano (among other pieces of random furniture/art/stuff throughout my time here.)

Where are you going? I’m off to Panama as a Peace Corps volunteer in the environmental and water resources engineering sector for the next couple of years, and perhaps I’ll be traveling further south after that. All I know is I’m leaving New York for a while, but I hope to be back before the end of the decade. :)

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2019?

  1. Read, write, and cultivate your creative side. There were moments that I told myself I was too busy to read or write (I speak only as an engineering major), and that I didn’t have time for things outside of my classes…I was wrong. Read books along with your friends, write what you feel and/or what you’ve done, even if just a few lines a day, and build up your canon of thought. I’ve slowly put together my own library of classics: books and articles and poems that have shaped my experience here. I have also included books of my own cultural patrimony, reading and studying them myself the same way I would a book from the core. Explore that part of yourself, away from the problem sets, and if writing is not your thing, do whatever is, but do not let your creative spark be stifled, and cultivate it along with every part of yourself while you’re here. I also encourage you to learn to build something, to use your hands and bring a physical project to completion. Enrich your academic life by exploring what you’re not so good at, or have never had the opportunity to try. The larger point I’m trying to make is really to just not get (too) caught up in the mundane, and to remember that while we are all students in pursuit of that next goal, pay attention to the periphery and be not afraid of veering a bit off the path.
  2. Columbia was for me, a difficult place to be at times, and it will be for some of you as well. Accept that disillusionment, anger, and anxiety may sometimes come, and do not be afraid to step away. I realized too late at times that I was allowed to be overwhelmed, and that I could take a step back and learn to breathe again, regardless if it pissed people off. Do not be afraid of your vulnerability, or of your fragility, because acknowledging that part of yourself makes you strong. What I’ve done/do to find myself again during hard times took time to learn as well, and so I encourage you to find that place – on campus, in the city, or in your head – where you feel comfortable enough to look into yourself and mend your broken pieces.
  3. Appreciate the staff and people that are part of your daily existence here on campus. While you might get looks throughout the city for approaching and/or greeting a stranger, take the time to learn about the public safety officers at the entrance to your residence hall, to the person swiping your card at the dining hall, to the person cleaning your living space. On some days it is they who remind me about the power of a smile, of a “how are you doing” that isn’t asked as a passing formality. Billy, and Murray, and Larry have known me since Day 1, and they are bearers of wisdom, kind words, and happiness. Remember them in turn, and be of service when you can. Don’t ignore the person cleaning your bathroom, taking out your trash. They are integral, necessary members of Columbia, and they are the people who make your comfort here possible.

More wisdom from Katherina next.

May

6

Written by

Still in bed, recovering from the various formals of the past couple of nights? Whether it was DG or Theta or Sig Chi or Beta (or none of them–we at Bwog have spent the last few nights at a booth at 1020), try to power through your hangover this morning and prepare a little for your impending exams.

Bwogline: U2 performed an impromptu concert Monday night on a subway platform in Grand Central Station. (iHeartRadio)

Study Tip: Feeling scattered and restless? Vacate your seat in Butler (for an hour or two, at least) and try going on a run in Riverside or hitting up a yoga class. Not only will exercise make you happier, but you’ll also feel more focused later on.

Procrastinate: Do you wish you were a piano prodigy, but you can’t even read music? Check this website out, and tap wildly at your laptop keyboard as if you actually knew what you were doing.

May

5

Written by

Following what we can now fortunately consider to be a regrettable preview, we are pleased to announce the official Spring 2015 Columbia University Marching Band Orgo Night event posters, sure to join their predecessors in offending and inspiring those portions of campus that will still give a shit amongst finals.

CUMB one CUMB all, Thursday, 11:55, in Butler 209. RSVP if you care to, here.

As is implied, this year Bwog will be on hand to offer you comedic advice in the proud Columbia tradition: poorly disguising our competitive interest, telling you to really consider joining our new literary magazine (have you seen the posters?!?), and implying that we are much, much better than you.

If you’re still making up you’re mind to go but really want to know how the Barnard Student Government Association feels about it all, be sure to check out our weekly coverage.

BWOG

 

The rest (as if you even need more after the above)

May

5

Written by

Doug

Doug Kronaizl

Got wisdom? Luckily, senior Doug Kronaizl does. We enlisted him to give us our daily dose of all that is wise in today’s senior wisdom. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Doug Kronaizl, Vermillion, SD, Columbia College, History

Claim to fame: Grand Poobah, Music Director, and resident Mariah Carey of the Columbia Kingsmen. I’m also a member of the elite 0.1% of Columbia students hailing from the Great State of South Dakota. If we’ve met, odds are I’ve told you a thing or two about the Rushmore State and you damn well better have enjoyed it.

Where are you going? Heading back to SoDak to head up political committee aiming to put an initiated constitutional amendment on the ballot in 2016. Did you know that last November, South Dakotans went out to the polls and, with a 55% majority, approved a law raising the minimum wage to $8.50? Democracy at work! When asked if he thought the Legislature would amend that law and re-lower the wage, our governor admitted that “would be a little bit of an affront to the voters who just adopted it” and then proceeded to redefine “affront” in order to affront the voters right in their collective face. I know you are all as incensed about this as I am so if you want to sign a petition to protect initiated measures in SD become a resident and hmu.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2019?

  1. Don’t hate on Lerner; embrace Lerner. Just know that the sooner you internalize that message, the sooner you will be truly at peace with yourself. Elevators are abysmally slow, the ramps are the ramps, and then there’s that damn turnstile at the Broadway entrance. Those features aside, here are some tips to ensure the best possible Lerner experience. Find the interior stairwells – they are your friends. Unless you have a scooter, they will get you where you need to go faster than any ramp ever could. Enjoy the amenities! Lerner piano rooms on the 5th floor that, if you’re lucky, you can claim all to yourself? Computer labs x 2? A dining hall? Not to mention the bubble tea. That’s all within a single building. MEGA PRO TIP. Envision this scene: it’s crunchtime and you need a quiet space to do some reading. Lerner Cinema is the place to be. The room is full of comfy seats and it’s always empty. Slight downside, laptoppers, the entire space is outlet-less.
  2. Take part in a small, tight-knit student group. En route from South Dakota in 2011, there were only two other people from my entire state in the Class of 2015. Entering NYC without knowing a single person can be terrifying and it was. Living so far from home definitely wore on me. But fortunately I joined the Kingsmen during my first week. Evening rehearsals, cool performances, roadtrips, all of these things and more ensured that I had some group I was a part of. Additionally, it introduced me to a group of students I could relate to. Making the transition campus can be tough, but having a small, focused group dynamic helps. Still, this is a plug as much as it is an answer to the question.
  3. Save a buck and utilize the Digital Humanities Center on the 3rd Floor of Butler. Professor expecting you to buy an entire book even though they only assign a single chapter for a single class? Save your hard-earned cash for things the really matter like Chipotle and Chipotle. Go to Butler, look that book up, enter the Stacks, find the book, take it to the DHC, scan the chapter as your own PDF. And if you have any questions, the DHC staff is one of the most helpful on this campus. Top-notch stuff.

John Jay didn’t always have Wifi?

May

5

Written by

pancake_midnight

stax on stax on stax

Tonight’s the night for the Midnight Pancake Breakfast at Broadway Presbyterian Church.  The doors will open at 11pm and stay open through 1am.  Come, fuel your studies with a buttery bite or two.  Invite your friends!

The evening is co-sponsored by BPC, Advent Lutheran Church, St. Paul & St. Andrew United Methodist Church, and Parity (www.parity.nyc).

Remember — breakfast is the most important meal of the day!  Why not have it twice?

May

5

Written by

"Sunrise, Sunset"

“Sunrise, Sunset”

You know it’s an interesting SGA meeting when Deborah Spar says, “This is the point in the conversation where I usually have to turn to my lawyer.” Not to worry, though, Barnard’s favorite celebrity is legally in the clear. Her lawyer comment came in response to a question about the line between students and the administration—specifically, at what point does the administration decide to make a statement on controversial issues such as Orgo Night? Spar’s point is that there’s no clear answer. The longer the Rep Council discussed Orgo Night, the more the Council realized that the issue is more complicated than anyone could have known.

Orgo Night was not on the official agenda for the evening, but came up organically (sorry, bad pun) while the Rep Council discussed events from this past academic year. After hearing someone say that they’d be interested in seeing what happens to Orgo Night, Spar jumped in and asked the Rep Council their thoughts on Orgo Night as a whole. Did she know that she was opening Pandora’s box? She must have had an inkling, but it seems that the Barnard administration is increasingly looking to students to guide the school’s responses to on- and off-campus issues. Although Spar admitted that the administration will likely remain reactive as opposed to proactive, she did say that receiving emails from students is typically what triggered school-wide responses from her office throughout the academic year. Spar wants to encourage students to continue to reach out to her office (and SGA) so that the administration can take its cues directly from students.

Hear about Orgo Night next.

May

5

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shutterstock_201562451

Hearing your professor’s final remarks like…

There’s nothing we love more than when we call and you answer. On this first real day of reading week, we bring to you the parting words of just a few of the professors on this campus. Read these and weep about the fact that the semester is now over and you need to study your ass off for the next two weeks!! Have any parting words from a professor that you wish to see in this list? Write it out in the comment section, and we’ll add it in. 

Bruce Conin, International Humanitarian Law – “Ted Cruz… I’m not going to say he looks like Satan, but there’s definitely a family resemblance.”

Robbie Harris, Intro to Biblical Literature – “There are such things as student evaluations, but I have tenure so those things don’t really impact me.”

Homa Zarghamee, Economics of Gender – “I believe in the ruthlessness of corporations enough that they’re not going to care who’s doing what.”

#ShitILearnedInLitHum after the jump.

May

5

Written by

Caleb

Caleb LoSchiavo

Now that classes are over and you can no longer glean enlightenment from your professors, Bwog has got you covered with your much-needed daily dose of wisdom. Here’s BC senior Caleb LoSchiavo’s senior wisdom to get you going. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Caleb LoSchiavo, “The College” (Barnard), Psychology major and Italian minor, hailing from Wyckoff, NJ

Claim to fame: You may know me as one of the prominent leaders of The Gay Agenda on campus. A hater once said to me in an email, “You might mean well and have good intentions but you are doing the opposite of you hope to achieve.” I’ve worked on overall education and awareness on campus as well as initiatives like gender neutral bathrooms on both sides of the street, trans inclusivity in mental health services, a preferred name option in SIS, and a trans-inclusive admissions policy at Barnard. So I think I’m doing exactly what I hope to achieve here.

Where are you going? Nowhere. No honestly, I’ll be here working on a show that was accepted to the Glicker-Milstein Summer Program. After that, I have no idea where I’ll be.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2019?

  1. If you want something to change at this school, I promise you’re not the only one who feels that way. Speak up. Find other students who share your drive and desires. A lot can happen if you join forces and get the right people to listen to you.
  2. You cannot do everything. You should not try to do everything. Just because there’s an open board position in your favourite student group doesn’t mean you need to fill it. Just because a class can fit into your schedule doesn’t mean it should. Your plate doesn’t always need to be so fill that it’s overflowing. Doing too much will inevitably backfire, and people won’t resent you for knowing your limits and respecting them (if they do, they’re probably not worth your time).
  3. The people who you can call family and who can make this place feel like home are out here. You might not find them right away—they might not be in your orientation group or on your first-year hall. I didn’t start to meet my people until October of my sophomore year. I’m still meeting more and more people. Your people might be in unexpected places, like a class you almost dropped or an event you almost didn’t go to. Don’t underestimate the power of chosen family.

Oral sex or cheese thoooo?

May

5

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shutterstock_117355264

fruity fresh

Ever find your sweet tooth unsatiated after eating a fruit salad? Scientists discovered earlier this week that the naturally-occurring sugar in fruit “leaves people hungrier and makes them greedier for glucose.” (The Times)

Workers at various branches of Aldi supermarkets in Berlin were shocked when they found boxes of bananas void of the fruit. Instead, the shipments supposedly bearing produce were filled with kilograms of cocaine. Police seized roughly 386 kg of the coco… that’s approximately 850 pounds!! (Deutsche Welle)

A woman in Venezuela is getting a new apartment after throwing a mango with her name and number written on it at the Venezuelan President during a rally. 54-year-old Marleni Olivo chucked a mango inscribed with the phrase “If you can, call me” at President Nicolas Maduro. (CNN)

The new Apple TV remote is going to go under some changes in design. The new remote is expected to have a touch pad, as well as a thicker body. (NY Times)

insert Wiggles song about fruit here via Shutterstock

May

5

Written by

The next big thing is here.Dear Bwog Readers,

Bwog was established in 2006 as a place to give students a revolutionary platform for learning about and communicating with their community at Columbia. In the nine years since, our readership and staff have steadily grown—but to this day, that dedication to our founding purpose has remained unchanged. There have been some bumps in the road over the years, but we have taken them in stride, reached out and engaged further with our readership, and taken the necessary steps to ensure that we always remain true to our roots.

But today, on behalf of the entire Bwog staff, I am proud to announce that Bwog is becoming a bit better. We’ve redesigned our entire site.

We’ve spent the past year and a half working with talented designers, engineers, and college students to construct an entirely new (well, really, just updated) experience. We’re extremely proud of it.

That being said, we’ve prioritized getting the redesign out to you all sooner rather than later over working out all of the kinks. We’re aware of most of them, but we would love to hear any and all feedback at redesign@bwog.com.

This redesign would not have been possible without the endless dedication of a small group of Columbia students. Our tech team (Kevin Chen, Andy Hadjigeorgiou, and Parker Case) stayed up many long nights drinking Red Bull and eating Doritos. Our editorial boards (fearlessly led by Sarah Faith Thompson, Maud Rozee, and Julia Goodman) had countless meetings. Our graphic designer, Alejandra Oliva, provided the creative inspiration.

So have at it! Read our posts, comment away, and keep doing what makes this place so very special. Most importantly, hold fast to the spirit of youth.

Fondly,

Jake Hershman
Publisher

May

4

Written by

At 6 pm this evening, Barnard College held a event doubly honoring the end of its 125th academic year and revealing the design plans for the new library, to be called the Teaching and Learning Center. Major construction is to begin Winter 2015 and some of Lehman’s offices and books are already starting their move over the summer into a “swing space” to be housed in LeFrak Gym.

The new center is set to offer a wide array of new amenities, like another cafe (besides Liz’s) and a connection to Altschul Hall that will provide for more laboratory space. For more information, refer to the TLC’s own site within Barnard to see its construction timeline, architectural setup, and more.

May

4

Written by

image1

We know what you did last night

Late on Saturday night, when even the most inebriated of us have retreated to their beds without brushing their teeth, the true animals of the night emerge to get their share of uncensured fun. Without students around to patrol them, Public Safety officers working the 4 am shift tip-toe out of their fort in Low, and come together in raw experiences of camaraderie. This isn’t the first time we’ve known Public Safety to be sneaky, but they’ve left remnants of their latest venture. Though the numbers aren’t totally clear, a couple or a group of officers were getting softly freaky in the penis fountains and whoever was on clean up duty was too caught up in the fun and left their Cinderella slipper behind. We’ll be handcuffing officers to see whose wrists match these babies, but for now, keep sending along your weekend finds to tips@bwog.com

Columbia unleashed

  • “Finally hit 100wpm. (Was at 99 for two years)”
  • “Ate an avocado. Did not see the Varsity Show. Got a sheet of penis stickers that I am very excited about.”
  • “Went to Cannon’s for the first time. It was the whitest thing I’ve ever experienced and I’m from New Hampshire. Spelled my last name for various front desk attendants while signing out of Columbia dorms.”
  • “Consumed three giant cantaloupes within one day. (What can I say? They were on sale for $1.25 each)”
  • “Fisted a puppet. Burnt my finger lighting a match in 1020. Got stuck on a stalled 1 train for 30 mins and almost scream-cried (it had been a long weekend).”
  • “Pretty sure I gave myself first degree burns from the bathroom sink in 1020.”
  • “Saw the Avengers at 11 pm opening night, saw it again at 2 am.”
  • “Found out that Alma has an outlet and drunk me rejoiced. A few days later sober me could not find the outlet and was devastated.”
  • “Cried while looking at photos of my family. It’s time to go home.”
  • “Made jungle juice for the first time (it had Everclear in it!). Friend hosted her birthday party in the EC suite of someone she has at least three degrees of separation with. We were locked out while the suite dwellers were at Varsity Show and once we got in the suite was solely filled with a large hookah and trash. Maybe some furniture. We cleaned up the trash but left the printed pieces of paper on the wall that read ‘puff, puff, puff, pass’ for decor.”

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