You’ve all been waiting — and quite frequently complaining in the comments section — for this one. Ladies and gentlemen on the eve of his graduation: The Dark Hand, Bwog’s eternal shadow haunting the comment space, crusading for some sort of truth and justice, and until recently one of campus’ biggest mysteries. He’s still pretty mysterious, though.
Name, Hometown, School: Nick Biekert from Avon, Connecticut, SEAS
Claim to fame? I am the Dark Hand.
Where are you going? To destroy this post’s comment section…WITH NO SURVIVORS!
3 things you learned at Columbia:
- The fire rises
- It doesn’t matter who we are, what matters is our plan. No one cared who I was ‘til I put on the mask.
- …Oh wait no those last two were just more Bane quotes. Sorry, sometimes I get confused. Since I have no actual wisdom of my own I’ll just quote Ralph Waldo Emerson and say that “a foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.” Like all philosophers, and by extension all humans, he was full of shit. It’s ok though, I still think the quote rings true—and besides if people try to call you on your shit, just claim it’s a postmodernist critique of satire…or something.
Back in my day…Gateway was totally different, although still mildly enjoyable if your group and project were alright, no one talked about CPS or wellness, Theon Greyjoy still had his penis, and Courseworks was actually functional. Sorry Varsity Show, I stole that last one from you guys, and because I tend to avoid platitudes I’ll say you guys did a good job. I don’t know why Bwog has to hate.
Oh yea, and I presume the Spec still sucked, although it’s not like I ever actually read the spec before I took up the crusade for truth and justice.