Here at Bwog we’re totally #grateful we had the opportunity to go back home, lug piles of still-incomplete homework across the country, have unproductive fights with the actual fam, and watch Jessica Jones to completion. And sometimes it got a little spicy, as evinced by our horrifying (or is it tantalizing?) screenshot from the Iowa Snapstory. As always, if you have something to add, send it in to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Tags: "are you sure you're not a lesbian yet?", black friday, come to our meetings for a great celebration loaf, crisis of faith, field notes, it's a sign from above if u get so fucked up after your first drink, keith urban, nebraska, our dealer is our best friend, PrezBo is so PrezBo even on the phone, ritz crackers, thanksgiving, the "faint trace of urine" is probs the administration pissing on ur hopes and dreams, the Bible money for alcohol is def sacrilegious, there are two types of people in the world: those who desperately want to crawl back into their mother's wombs and feel safe and full again and those who hate thanksgiving, Veuve Clicquot, vomiting into your hands while on the F train: a state of mind, we found alcohol in a hopeless place, we survived, we're starting a jessica jones support group so email ur deets to tips to join, what IS stuffing??, wow
It’s weird, even to us, but—you have friends! Cool ones, who might even be graduating this term and who will be missed. Whether or not you think they’ll be interested in sharing their knowledge with us via our long and storied tradition of Senior Wisdoms, go ahead and nominate them by emailing us at email@example.com (or by using the tip form). Please include a short description of why you think they deserve a senior wisdom in your message, even if your justification is just that this person is a class meme, an admirable human being, or the tangible (anti-)embodiment of Columbia.
While we received some great nominations in our recent call for senior wisdoms, we must remind you that time is finite and fleeting. So please, go crazy! You have pretty much all the power since we’re not too selective this time of year!
Walking Your Friend Back from 1020 via Shutterstock
Tags: bwog gets desperate pt 1 million, bwog was born in its final form and never had to have wisdom teeth removed, do you even go here, do you even have friends, even if you're a failure of a senior the people who will be reading with the most keen eyes will be pre/frosh and you are so much smarter than them!!, real talk: our inbox is overflowing but it's always good to have options, senior wisdoms, we are okay with being trolled, we can't afford to be picky
We have received a tip containing both a press release by the Activities Board at Columbia (ABC) in response to alleged bias on the ABC board as well as the funding allocations for the next year.
The press release expresses that “recent allegations that cultural organizations governed by the Activities Board at Columbia (specifically in the Black, Latinx, and Native American category) are treated unfairly or differently than other organizations was and continues to be very serious.” The ABC held a forum to address such concerns, where “many community members attended and expressed larger structural concerns as well as possible solutions.”
Consequently, the ABC released a list of “concrete measures” and “conversations opened up.”
Written by Finn Klauber
Bucket List represents the inordinate intellectual privilege we enjoy as Columbia students. We do our very best to bring to your attention important guest lecturers and special events on campus. Take a break from pre-finals studying to look at our recommendations for this academic week below with the full list after the jump.
Tags: a writing prompt: take three random events from this list and make a story out of them, art poetry love loss peace war etc, between pacifism and the need to start drama, bucket list, doing bucket list on monday is about the most crazy we get at bwog, get some culture, stargazing at pupin/not poopin' in pupin, why are all these events when we have class?
A perfectly ordinary family/an obsolete institution released pictures of one of its newer members, under the impression that anyone would care (we kind of do). (USA Today)
Rejoice, for the Age of the Internet stretches before us, unmoved and unyielding. As a result of shoppers flocking to online deals, Black Friday store sales have slipped this year—although it was still a pretty dark night of the soul for a lot of people. (US News)
Post-Thanksgiving topicality: Turkey has struck a deal with European leaders regarding the refugee crisis, receiving money and concessions in exchange for keeping refugees from entering Europe. (BBC)
Revelations abound as investigators try to piece together the motivations of the suspected Colorado Springs Planned Parenthood shooter.
On a lighter note, who was the thief who absconded with a case of Red Bull from a delivery truck in the Bronx, stealing our hearts/giving us wings in the process?
VShow Anticipation via Shutterstock
Tags: babywatch, bwog is kinda scared of black friday, bwoglines, planned parenthood shooting, royal fam, the only people we've met more desperate for energy drinks are Columbia students obvs, Turkey going cold turkey, w4m: seeking the red bull thief who bestowed wings on our heart, we don't have enough knowledge to know whether this deal is good or bad, when Internet people become irl people become Internet people
Happy Thanksgiving, friends! Sure, we may have had some classes today, and it’s never too early to start those problem sets due on Monday, but this is the time to set aside work, be thankful, and get the hell out of MoHi.
That’s why Bwog is taking a break to live, breathe, and drink the holiday cheer. Whether you’re at home around a table with your family or at 1020 around a table with a few (too many) drinks, we hope you’ll be enjoying it all the same. Unless something important comes up, we’ll be shuffling back to Columbia in post-holiday mirth on Monday.
Be sure to send your tips, stories, and pictures to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Lastly, following Bwog tradition, we’re here to share our annual (truncated) list of things we’re thankful for. Comment below some of the stuff you’re thankful for this year!
Tags: Adventure Time and Steven Universe are great, beta, Beta is undeniably the best though, Bosses who smoke you out are the best bosses, bwog out, dogs >>>>>>>>>>>> cats, Druuuuuuuuunch, HamDel and Keystone light are great, having Spotify Premium is an attractive quality ngl, what we're thankful for
Written by Ross Chapman
The Coke Freestyle machines in the dining halls are confusing. Ever since their latest UI change, getting something as simple as water is harder than ever. But even in the face of this harsh adversity, we can make it easier on our fellow students. What should you do after you get your drink? Should you leave the machine on your selection, or should you go back to the main menu? Maybe you should set it to the “all drinks” page instead? Or is sorting by flavor the one true system? In an effort to answer these pressing questions, we decided to investigate.
Doing his best Shamus Khan impression, a Bwog reporter stood nonchalantly against the wall in JJ’s place on a weeknight, recording the soda choices (and keystrokes to get there) of everyone who used the machine. Here are the basic statistical findings:
Written by Joe Milholland
GSSC is in the holiday season this week. Between GSSC giving things away and providing snacks for finals, student government liaison Joe Milholland could barely keep up with the holiday cheer.
On Tuesday night, the General Studies Student Council (GSSC) spent much of their time at their weekly general body meeting discussing two topics related to products they want to buy for GS students, both ones they will give away and ones they will sell.
For stuff they’re giving away for free, the council debated a proposal, spearheaded by the VP of finance, to spend $3500 on several items, including GSSC coffee mugs/tumblers. Since the funds for this stuff comes from leftover money in the budget for this semester, GSSC President Elizabeth Heyman, while acknowledging give-aways are necessary to get people to come to events, encouraged GSSC’s money to be spent on more “substantive, meaningful programming” to ensure that all the money in a budget is spent.
Written by Megan Fillion
129 murdered in Paris on November 13th, 43 killed in Lebanon one day earlier, and hundreds more killed since the beginning of 2015 – all these deaths were at the hands of the terrorist organization ISIS. As the dead were mourned and awareness of the bloodshed spread, the Islamic state only gained more power world-wide.
Yesterday, SIPA hosted a panel called “ISIS after Paris” which discussed ISIS’s ever growing influence despite the western world’s plans to contain it. Although the panelists were all very knowledgeable about the subject, the discussion stayed fairly broad and hypothetical.
Written by Betsy Ladyzhets
We all know the feeling: you’re riding the subway down to Penn Station, you have half an hour before your train leaves, you’re desperately telling yourself that everything will be fine – and then, without even the slightest warning, the train just stops. It stops! Right in the middle of the track! Between stops! Is this even allowed? Whether it is or isn’t, the outcome is the same: your stress level, which you previously thought was at its peak, has now risen tenfold.
Taking public transportation is a gamble on your best days, much less when you have planes, trains, buses, or other vehicles to catch in order to get home for Thanksgiving. But unfortunately, as broke college students, many of us can’t afford to take cabs or ubers (or have never taken a cab or uber before and are, at this point, too afraid to ask how exactly it’s done), and thus, we must brave the terrors of finicky public transportation. Of course, this isn’t to say that private transportation doesn’t have some faults, too – the likelihood of you facing a ridiculously short time between connecting flights or an Amtrak train conductor who keeps making mysterious announcements about arrival time is, sadly, very high. And, perhaps worst of all, when you’re on a subway, or in the air, or riding through the Midwest, a quality internet connection is rare, making distracting yourself from your problems so much harder.
Tags: dogs in riverside...yes, gotta learn that 5th declension sometime right?, living where there's good public transport is fantastic after living without any, public transport is great but taking public transport sucks, some of us will be lying on the beach soon, who gets drunk on a tuesday? *Bwog slowly raises hand*
Yesterday, a Russian jet was downed but Turkey near its border with Syria. Everyone’s favorite president/dictator Vladimir Putin condemned the attack as a “stab in the back.” (BBC)
Pope Francis begins his five day African tour in Kenya today. On his agenda may be gay rights, vigilante justice, and religious tensions with Muslims. (BBC)
Blue Origin, a company owned by Amazon boss Jeff Bezos, successfully launched a reusable rocket. The propulsion unit landed vertically on the launch pad while a passenger capsule was lifted to over 60 miles. (USAToday)
Pacha New York, an EDM-focused club, is finally closing after a decade of dance. The club is set to close after a 72 hour dance marathon on New Year’s Eve. (PachaNYC)
We all know how it feels to be a bit… er… loose with our definition of “telling the truth” when nosy Aunt Madge asks all of those invasive questions during Thanksgiving dinner. Here’s a quick reference sheet that will help you translate your Fall-semester shenanigans into more family-friendly language before you head into the fire this Thursday.
Random relative: “What are your plans for after graduation?”
What you say: “I might join the Air Force.”
What you mean: “Your questions are giving me anxiety so I’m going to down this nice glass of wine and keep drinking until I start to believe that I can actually fly.”
Random relative: “How’s [underclassman from your high school who now goes to Columbia] doing?”
What you say: “They’re doing great! They seem to be making good friends.”
What you mean: “They got CAVA’d at a Carman party they invited me to during NSOP and I haven’t seen them since.”
Random relative: “Are you getting enough sleep?”
What you say: “I try to get 5 or 6 hours every night. It doesn’t always happen, if I have a lot of work, but I can usually catch up on weekends.”
What you mean: “Last week, I tried to pull an all-nighter to study for a test, but I accidentally fell asleep in Butler at 5am, slept until 11, and completely missed the class the test was in. And I somehow get less sleep on the weekends than I do during the week. College is cruel and merciless and I don’t think my sleep schedule will ever recover.”
Written by Joanna Zhang
Time for another round of investigations into different cultural superstitions held by Columbia students. This week, staffer Joanna also shares some insights into her own (Chinese) culture’s practices (involving food, just to whet your appetite for this Thursday)!
Thanksgiving is coming up! This usually means means family dinners and, inevitably, dealing with unwanted questions from relatives. Before you sit down and shove turkey down your throat, here are some tips from the ever-so-superstitious Chinese culture. First and foremost, if you ever use chopsticks (or any utensils), don’t rest them vertically in your food. The Chinese culture believes that is a harbinger of death because it resembles incense sticks lit before graves. That’s why there’s usually a chopstick stand in Chinese restaurants, and if there isn’t you can make your own with the chopstick wrapper. When you’re eating fish (which is highly unlikely seeing as it’s Turkey Day), don’t flip over the fish. Chinese people generally eat fish whole, and a whole fish symbolizes a boat. If you flip over the fish, it means you’ve capsized the “boat,” therefore bringing a lot of bad luck. Finally, always have an even number of dishes on the table. Remember yin and yang? Odd numbers are associated with yin, which is negative energy, while even numbers are associated with yang, the positive energy.
Enough about food, here are some more non-Chinese superstitions:
Ioana Alecsiu (CC ‘14) – Romania
“There’s a lot of superstitions in Romania, some are religious, others depend on the area you’re coming from. We consider Tuesdays to be unlucky days, with three unlucky hours called the three dark hours of Tuesday. It’s probably a coincidence, but every single injury that I had during my four years at Columbia all happened on a Tuesday. There’s the typical taboo on the number 13, but it’s not as big of a deal as it is in the U.S. We also consider it unlucky to step out the door right foot first, I still actively make sure I don’t do it every day, it’s kind of engrained in me. There’s also the idea that Fridays are unlucky, but not a lot of people believe in it. As for a weird one, supposedly when something bad happens to you, if you throw salt over your shoulder, it will take away the bad things.”
(Image taken from Columbia Athletics)
Thanksgiving will soon be upon us, and that means plenty of delicious things to look forward to: turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, and other heavenly cuisine. But aside from the food, Thanksgiving also means human interaction, and lots of it. Interacting with relatives is one thing, but running into old friends (and acquaintances and enemies) is a whole different ball game. This week we received an anonymous question asking us for guidance on how to deal with seeing people from home. We thought we’d take this opportunity to not only answer this specific inquiry, but also provide assistance with confronting people from your past, whether it be an old frenemy, a former flame, or even a terrible teacher.
I’m so excited for break and to reunite with my family after three months away from home. My friends from high school are planning a reunion as well, and although I’m eager to see some of them, I’ve fallen out of touch with a few others. There are two girls in particular, and it’s not that we had some sort of blow out fight – or even a falling out really – but we no longer have anything in common, and I know it’s gonna be uncomfortable after this much time apart. What if we have zero to say to each other? What should I do?
Thanks in advance,
Anticipating The Awkward
Has it been your dream since birth to be one of the Seinfeld gang? Well, the show ended years ago (and was fictional) so you may be a little delusional. But you CAN have the next best thing—Thanksgiving dinner at Tom’s (a.k.a. Seinfeld’s famed Monk’s Diner)! For only $29, you can enjoy the most Seinfeld-ian experience possible: Thanksgiving dinner alone (or with some other sad-sack freshmen who forgot to book their tickets home on time) in New York City. Jerry would surely approve.
Ketchup on Turkey? via Shutterstock
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