What’s Playing Nearby

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In which staffer Mark Krotov gives movie suggestions for those who fear to venture off the 1, 2, and 3 lines.

AMC Loews 84th Street 6

84th and Broadway

The Benchwarmers
If what you’ve always wanted is a film starring David Spade, Rob Schneider, and Napoleon Dynamite’s Jon Heder, then this is the film for you. Afterwards, you can reach Columbia’s counseling services at 212 854 2284.

Phat Girlz
Sometimes, a film’s title tells you everything that you need to know about a film; for example, Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector.

According to the major critics, A-Town manages to hold it down for at least two thirds of this film.

V for Vendetta
This film has demonstrated that in a box office crowded with too many gems, dystopian epics can still hold their own.

Also Playing:

Stay Alive
The Shaggy Dog

Lincoln Plaza Cinemas

Broadway between 62nd and 63rd

The Beauty Academy of Kabul
Heart-warming and uplifting, just like the invasion of Afghanistan.

Don’t Come Knocking
Because of his success with this road movie, legendary director Wim Wenders will next direct Euro Trip 2: Screwing Eastern Europe.

Free Zone
Natalie Portman is awfully political these days, with V and this new film about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Doesn’t she know that she’s supposed to shut up and look pretty? Or at least bald?

Also Playing:
The Child (L’Enfant)

AMC Loews Lincoln Square 12

68th and Broadway

Lucky Number Slevin
Starring Josh Hartnett and Bruce Willis, this gangster film is a tale of a man who was born to have his last name become a bad pun in a Hollywood movie.

Take the Lead
Is there anything worth saying? Antonio Banderas, troubled teens, and lotsof dancing. If you’re not interested after that description, then what kind of man are you?

Friends with Money
If the guys that produced Lucky Number Slevin had produced this film, it would have been called Friends with Monkey, and would have revolved around Jennifer Aniston, Catherine Keener, and Joan Cusack bonding over their purchase of a cute primate.

Basic Instinct 2
This is too easy.

Inside Man
Please go see it. Spike Lee and Denzel Washington create a truly great movie that manages to be a simple heist film and not at all a simple heist film. Plus, social commentary!

She’s the Man
Nickelodeon’s Amanda Bynes tells Shakespeare like it is. That is, with tweens.

Also Playing:
Ice Age: The Meltdown
Thank You For Smoking
V for Vendetta: The IMAX Experience
Failure to Launch
Deep Sea 3D
Roving Mars

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  1. ignant bout movies

    hey blog:

    could you please provide IMDB links re: your movies? It'd help me figure out if I actually wanna venture down the 1,2,3


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