This is the third post in the senior wisdom series. Read the rest here.

Megan Greenwell, BC ’06.
Claim to fame: Spectator Editor-in-Chief.
Post-grad plans: Metro Reporter for the Washington Post.

Preferred swim test stroke?

I call it “the BarnSEAS”: it mostly consists of pointing and laughing at Columbia College kids while we all sip margaritas on dry land.

What are three things you learned at Columbia?

1. How to write academic papers. This probably should have happened earlier, but I’m a product of a truly terrible public high school.
2. Which deadlines matter (thesis, for example) and which ones don’t (any other coursework).
3. Lee Bollinger’s cell phone number.

Justify your existence in 30 words or less.

If there’s a scandal, I’ll find it. And I make a mean mint julep.

What was your favorite controversy in your time at Columbia?

Nick DeGenova’s “I wish for a million Mogadishus” remark at the anti-war teach-in during our freshman year—a controversy whose brilliance is truly underappreciated. It was the first time Bollinger was accused of being wishy-washy—first he said DeGenova’s statement “crossed the line,” then later he opined about the value of free speech. Plus, the organizers of the teach-in couldn’t disassociate themselves from the guy quickly enough. “He ended up on that platform by accident, almost by manipulation,” said the professor who planned the event.

What Columbia memory best exemplifies your college experience?

Walking home at 4 a.m. on Thursday nights completely sober as everyone else stumbled back from the bars. It happened every week for six solid semesters, though I can’t say I particularly regret it.

Which Prof do you think would be the best kisser?

My top choice is a TA, not a professor: Ben Soskis, who worked for Foner, among other people. But Roosevelt Montas is a full professor now, right? He’s a close second.

What percentage of seniors do you think are virgins?

Thirty percent by choice for religious purposes, an additional five percent for less noble reasons.

Would you rather permanently give up oral sex or cheese?

Oral sex, hands-down. Especially now that Cara Rachele has introduced me to morbier. The only two people I know who would seriously give the opposite answer are out of their minds anyway.

Days on campus memory?

I didn’t go. But when a younger friend came, he spent all night making out in Central Park with a then-freshman that he met in John Jay. He decided to enroll.

Regrets?

Taking my grades too seriously for too long… going to Winter Gala… feeling obligated to be nice to the guy that followed me home after CUnity.