Global Warming: The Beach Party

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If only they had a Slip n’ Slide…

The College Republicans held a global warming beach party on the lawn to the east of the steps today to protest the recent screenings on campus of the Al Gore film “An Inconvenient Truth”.

In an email, Chris Kulawik described the mission of the party: While global warming poses a great debate for our generation, a majority of Republicans would disagree with the Columbia administration; they do not believe Al Gore is the sane, realist voice capable of presenting an unbiased account of the issue at hand.

Continued after the jump…


When Bwog stopped by to check it out, there were 20 beach balls, an umbrella and 6 people gracing the lawn. The soda was a bit globally warmed by 1:30 PM, but the doughnuts and starburst were fresh. When asked about the College Republican’s stance on global warming, Kulawik said, “Our club has no official stance on Global Warming. Our members hold a lot of different beliefs.” The beach-goer to his left piped in, “Personally, I think it’s a problem.”


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  1. suggestion  

    He should retitle his column Everybody Hates Chris.

  2. nah  

    he'd enjoy that too much

  3. this was  

    pointless, but also hilarious. props to the republicans for highlighting the absurdity of politics rather than descending into typical partisan bantering- for once.

  4. Agh. Figure it out.  

    Kulawik really dropped the ball on this one. GLOBAL WARMING BEACH PARTIES ARE SUPPOSED TO MAKE GLOBAL WARMING SEEM LIKE AN AWESOME FUN PARTY-TIME. That's the whole friggin point. If you're going to copy other schools' College Repub chapters - this joke is old, folks - at least do it right. Look at those kids in the picture. Ugh. That girl's chair is pointed toward the wall. LAME. And is that sand bucket full of chips? Awful. TRY HARDER. Other schools had sno-cones, more people, and less clothing. Kulawik gives us this? This empty plaza wasteland with a dork wearing shorts? Low-budget hack-work.

  5. it was actually  

    fairly disappointing. a good idea (though not original i gather) but poorly executed. should have spend less time flyering and more time grilling hot dogs.

  6. i like how  

    all the criticisms demand more free stuff be given out. I doubt they have the budget of some other schools

  7. Indeed

    Speaking of low-budgets, you can thank the Student Governing Board -- led by College Democrat Presidential Contender Jon Siegel this year -- for that. As always, College Democrat funding at Columbia is more than ten times that of the Republicans -- even though the College Democrats have at most four times the membership. That's keeping it fair and balanced!

    And I don't know about you, but beach parties are all about balls dropping and being hit and everything. We need more beach parties, damn it. Thanks Chris!

    • J Train  

      Do you have any idea how ABC/SGB assigns club budgets? It's a long process where your club has to produce detailed yet realistic proposals for events, including projected attendance. Looking at the six people who attended this event, no wonder they haven't got a large budget. There's no bias against the College Republicans on the financial front - they just need to prove they can bring people in on the budget they currently have before asking for more money.

  8. J Train  

    Wow, really grasping at partisan straws there, Chris.

    • Odd, J train,  

      why must you assume anything critical of the left comes from Kulawik? I can assure you, it didn't. And while you'll find me at dem meetings, I must admit, it's really kinda sad how little we do in relation to the Repubs. They already beat us to the first news worthy event of the year and you really have to admit that we have more resources than they do. It's just a fact. Get of the defensive.

  9. choir  

    campus liberals preaching to the choir bore the shit out of me. congrats to the republicans for hosting an event we can all laugh at rather than face a protest of in the morning.

  10. not to mentino

    who they are bringing in as speakers this year...great events to come and one big one right before the election. Its obvious they deserve more money, but given the strucutre and COMPLETE BIAS of the SGB it will never happen.

  11. not to mentino

    who they are bringing in as speakers this year...great events to come and one big one right before the election. Its obvious they deserve more money, but given the strucutre and COMPLETE BIAS of the SGB it will never happen.

  12. Indeed

    J Train, its amazing how Jon starts with J -- could there be a connection there? I wonder. Particularly with the defense of how SGB funds are awarded that followed, I think its safe to assume that you are Jon. Great stuff.

    For your information, I have been at Columbia before Chris even arrived, and am not Chris. If you are Jon, you even know me well.

    And as much as I like Jon (or yourself, presuming you are Jon) -- and for the most part I do -- I don't think it's honest to say that a former College Democrat Presidential Contender can conduct a fair review of College Republican funding.

    And if it's projected attendance you want to seem, look at the John Ashcroft event. The College Democrats spent more funds countering the John Ashcroft event last semester than the College Republicans had in their budget -- and that one event brought more people out (Republicans and Democrats) than ANY held by the College Democrats.

    The College Republicans have shown they can bring a crowd out with 1/10th the funds of the College Democrats. All they want is an equal opportunity to be heard.

    And the chance to have a sno-cone machine on Low Library steps. That would help increase turn-out -- although the turn out was definitely more than 6. If you show up at the end of the event (by the bwog's time reference, 2.5 hours after it started), expect to see only the few remaining people. That's how things work. Please show me how many College Democrat events last for 2.5 hours...

  13. Indeed

    I'm pretty sure a beach party is a much more fun event than anything the College Republicans or College Democrats usually do, too. If more political group funding was devoted to informal gatherings like this than to watching Al Gore talk about Armageddon, I think students would feel more positive about politics as a whole.

    Maybe that's just me. In any case, I'll feel free to blame Jon all day long for depriving me of my sno-cone and hot dogs.

    As Gulati mentioned, hot dogs may be an inferior good, but they can at least bring us some pleasure. Thank you, SGB, for taking these small pleasures out of my life so that we can watch Al Gore!

  14. Indeed

    My apologies to Jon and Julia. Although thanks for pointing out ANOTHER overly partisan liberal sitting on the SGB board, deciding on how many more funds should go to the College Democrats than College Republicans, and depriving me of sno-cones and hot dogs today...

  15. not to mentino

    who they are bringing in as speakers this year...great events to come and one big one right before the election. Its obvious they deserve more money, but given the strucutre and COMPLETE BIAS of the SGB it will never happen.

  16. anonymous coward  

    if you're concerned w/ how SGB doles out cash, you should go to one of their meetings. they are completely open to the public.

  17. speakers?

    And don't worry. You had plenty of advance notice that Ashcroft was coming. I doubt that this year's surprise visitors will be any better "hidden." Maybe less ominous posters? Nahhh, I think that's too much to ask from Kulawik. Got to love him for that.

  18. whoa  

    calm down, reactionary party hacks. it's not like anyone is going to bring down liberalism at columbia, or that there's actually some great right wing conspiracy ready to slip its tentacles around low library...

  19. one of their  

    disclosed speakers is jim gilchrist who i believe is head of the minuteman. that actually has the potential to be a great event.

    they also have one of the famous conservative harvard history profs going- prob to highlight their incessant whining about 'ideological diversity'

    otherwise, my friend who went to their first meeting told me they have one 'ashcroft' caliber or even bigger speaker coming right before election time

  20. apparently they're  

    keeping in under wraps so they don't get as much organized protest as ashcroft

    i'll try to find out if i can, though my friends surprisingly mum about it

  21. this  

    event has to be considered a success for them. already as many posts (not counting duplicates from imbeciles who can't learn to post) on a bwog story as the last personals thing

    and to boot it was actually pretty clever and visible

  22. La Comedia  

    This was clever and funny? Really?

    I thought we were cynical, but apparently we're all so desperate for individuality that we're even willing to applaud a Republican's laughable self-immolation in the name of...well, nothing, according to him. Kind of sad really.

  23. anonymous coward

    did the CU republicans really copy something other schools' republican groups had done AGAIN?

    i thought it was pretty lame when they copied a reverse-affirmative action bake sale, which I think had been started by texas A+M or something.

    please at least show some creativity.

  24. mumbojumbo  

    Oh, Columbia and its politics. What's ironic here is that global warming isn't just a DEMOCRAT issue or a REPUBLICAN issue. It's an issue for everyone around the world (us in particular because we suck). REPUBLICANS aren't that different from anybody else. Everybody is a person. Everybody is affected by global warming. And everybody needs to do something about it. So who the hell cares that this Kulawik character is copying another school or is really vocal about his opinions? Just respect them, and don't tear them down just because you and everyone else at Columbia disagrees with him. Does anybody know anything about him other than the fact that he's Columbia's hardcore REPUBLICAN? He is a person too, just like you and I. People are people so why should it be, you and I should get along so awfully? Do dodo.

  25. UNITY 08  


  26. Anonymous

    Why doesn't Kulawik address global warming? What relevance does his beach party hold if it makes no stance other than to say that he doesn't like Al Gore, which is all he's saying, right?

    By the time we get past this "global warming is a good debate for our generation" phase, it will have already occurred.

    Kulawik is not just a hardcore republican. If you go back and read all of his editorials, they are notorious for factual inaccuracy and logical fallacy. Fact.

  27. Anonymous

    further more, if Al Gore is not a sane voice in the discussion, who is? Obviously since he has no faith in the Columbia Administration or Columbia academics who hold the same position as Gore, the only people left are political pundits who are as far separated from objective truth as possible. Eliminating someone from the discussion because you don't think they are "sane" without addressing why is stupid, and so is Chris.

    • note the  

      Al Gore + Columbia Academics

      of the two, Al's made it his pet project and the Columbians make their living off it - both would have us believe that the next generation will live in some bunker /underground (and yes, that's been seriously proposed). Centuries of temperature flux are never considered, rather, slight changes "imply" causation & if you checked the news yesterday, Gore is calling for a "tax" now.

    • oh boy  

      LOL @ ad hominems

      When you disagree with someone, insult them! Now that's productive...

  28. Facts

    ironic Stephen that you claim that Chris's columns/opinions are wraught with factual innacuracies. When did facts ever get in the way of the left's arguments.

    you asked why Gore is not a "sane" addition to the discussion and the reason why is that he has a vested interest in imposing his hypothesis regarding Global Warming down the throats of people. Doing so positions him well with the KosKids segment of the Democratic left in his potential bid for the 08 Dem nomination.

    By remaining in the spotlight via the Global Warming vehicle he can gauge his support for this run before he actually announces. This immediately eliminates him as a "sane" voice because he has ulterior motives.

    Next, global warming is just in its hypothesis stage. There is absolutely, positively no proof that the current increase in global temperatures is anything more than cyclical. Until there can be undisputed proof that it is entirely man made and that there is no connection to the changes that have historically happened throughout time then the hard core enviorradicals stance should be viewed as just that, radical.

    Forcing the US into a highly flawed, biased and punative treaty as Kyoto would do nothing other than cause the economic downturn of the worlds great economies especially here in the US. Then where would the left be, complaining about the economy!!

    BTW Chris isnt the only HARDCORE republican on campus ;)

  29. I hate

    beach parties. And sand. Wait...what does this have to do with politics?

    • Reni Laine

      My question exactly. I love the people who say they wish more campus events done by the college dems and repubs were "fun" and "less dramatic." Because having a good time is way more important than discussing politics.

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