Boys at Columbia are Fashion Nuggets

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Professor Thomas Bernstein (Life Cycles of Communist Regimes) is wise in his old years.  Earlier today, he explained a fashion phenomenon with a silver tongue:

“I don’t understand why it is that people wear baggy pants. Soviet leaders used to wear them in the 1950s, but then they wised up, got Italian suits and looked pretty spiffy. Today, young men wear baggy pants all the time. I think that they must have a disease, perhaps testicular elephantiasis.”

Thanks to Rachael McMillan for the e-mail.

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  1. Bold assertion:  

    Bernstein is the ultra-dry-humor version of Bulliet.

  2. ahhhh  

    skinny jeans > baggy pants

  3. umm no

    skinny jeans only look good if you're actually very very skinny. or if you're a relatively thin guy; they don't flatter hips.

  4. No!

    Skinny jeans are horrifying. Especially on men. I often see them on one particular guy and all I want to do is kidnap the poor bastard and dress him in clothing that doesn't make him look like an Olsen twin. Is that wrong?

    • I agree  

      I agree. Super skinny jeans on dudes are just plain weird. Where did your nuts go buddy? And also, how do you walk?

      I've even seen dudes with jeans so tight that they had to unbutton them and keep the fly unzipped. Hey, hipster loser, that is fucked up. Keep your dick in your pants and find some proper-fitting clothing!

  5. bernstein  

    is the man. especially when he sort of wobbles as he lectures.

  6. Otto von Bismarck  

    I don't think he's necessarily advocating "skinny jeans", so much as opposing silly, baggy ones.

    Big, baggy pants with some goofy XXL shirt looks absurd.

    Puff Daddy can fuck right off, in my humble opinion.

  7. anyone  

    go to the Iran debate thing w/ Bulliet? Isn't "Operation Bite" happening today? LOL.

  8. Nuts!

    How am I supposed to wear skinny jeans when I've got such a huge ass?

  9. Tight Denim  

    Skinny/tight jeans are awful on us guys. I can't walk in them and it hurts to sit down. Seriously, the only people who wear them are the wannabe hipster/indie rock/emo kids. And they always wear them with Converse shoes.

    Indie rock fucking sucks, for the record.

  10. losers  

    Guys who wear tight jeans are sheep. It's not a good look so people obviously only do it because it's a "thing." Also, there is such a thing as "regular" pants...this baggy/skinny thing is stupid. Finally, only black people wear baggy pants these days so this professor is clearly a racist. No, the irony of that statement is not lost on me. fuck you

  11. Levi Strauss  

    What are you talking about. Skinny jeans are great for men, and women. All the better to see their junk with!

  12. Well

    The only guys who can pull off skinny jeans are Steven Tyler and all the other old fogie rockstars.

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