Class Bonding Crash Course 2009
Written by Bwog Staff
Class of 2009, you have officially reached the point at which the school will buy you a Bud Light–and all it asks in return is that you please, please hang out with the rest of your class. In Lerner Party Space. With faint music playing on someone’s iPod speakers.
By mixing you together with moderate amounts of alcohol and an atmospheric disco ball–a ritual known as Lerner Pub, tonight and for many Thursdays hereafter–Columbia hopes to forge you into a unified body that will scream itself hoarse at graduation and fondly remember Alma when those first big checks come rolling in. You will start by realizing how many of those people you don’t know, how many you once knew and decided you didn’t like, how many you knew peripherally but will never really become friends with.
People will stroll in with posses, regally descending the central staircase, while others will take refuge from awkwardness-producing ambushes by glueing themselves to the wall. You’ll fight through to the front of the beer mob to claim your Solo cup, and then wend your way back to the light by hopping from island to island of familiar faces. But not for too long–you’ve got other places to be. This was just the pre-game.
Welcome to the rest of your life!