AltSpec: Apocalypse Now

Written by

 Image via Photobucket

Your romance woes are nothing to whine about.  Daughters of almost-Presidents assure us that the dating scene gets even worse after college.

The Times of India reflects their students’ worries about getting in to college here.  They translate PrezBo’s assurances of financial aid stability into a harrowing tale of rejection and domestic TA’s.

Promising the inside scoop on the moon’s demise, National Geographic, Google Images’ predecessor, tell us that CU astrophysicist wants to know why the moon occasionally has bright patches.  “Last Gasps“?  Maybe.  “Radon Blasts”?  More likely.

The flu virus is our very own Andromeda Strain.  The awkwardly-named drug Tamiflu no longer works, say doctors, and it worries them.  A CUMC professor of microbiology, however, calls it “amazing.”  Hooray, plague!

Let alone save energy, DST furthering our depression, says a CU “biological rhythms expert.”  To fix that, buy a dawn simulator.  Or, you know, turn on a light when you wake up.

Litter, litter, everywhere.  Local residents apparently have nothing to worry about except for an overabundance of shady movers’ signs.

1 Comment

  1. rough

    that article makes meghan mccain look not only vapid but like kind of an idiot. sad, really. and she...writes for a living? seriously?

© 2006-2015 Blue and White Publishing Inc.