AltSpec: Lost Hope, Stretched Trope

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It’s time for AltSpec once again, in which Bwog reminds you that you’re far less successful than your esteemed colleagues.

h1n1 rap screenshotPiglet flu took down Big Red and now it’s bearing down on light blue.  Thankfully, “Dr. John Clarke” has some nearly-rhyming advice to avoid the sniffles.

Remember that you can always validate your choice of major with a hint of economics.  Job market be damned, let’s all learn a dead language.

The last person to save Columbia from perpetual embarrassment decided his time was better spent steering engineers than Lions.

With our growing debt, we’re all going to be manic-depressives by the time we’re thirty, guaranteeing a similar fate for our alien mutants children.

The New York Times uses the cover of a restaurant “review” to spy on an unsuspecting Columbia couple eating lunch. “I’m already turning elitist” cries one, hiding his pride.  Photo via YouTube.


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  1. mr. baker

    can put one in my ovennn.

  2. haha

    "A friend shamed Columbia into buying Campbell a fresh set of tires lest he slide off the road in the Poconos or the Berkshires."

    That's the uncaring and cold school I know and love!

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