Written by

it's what you learned in elementary school

The sanctity of the Butler reference room has been tarnished. Quiet frustration spreads, while girlish squeals echo across 114th street. 409ers have whipped out their ear plugs. “WHAT IS WITH ALL THE SCREAMING WOMEN,” pleads one frenzied tipster. It seems sorority rush is in full swing.

Honestly, guys, it’s really not that bad.

Update: One Carmanite started tooting a vuvuzela…unclear whether in support or protest.



  1. ...

    You are wrong. It *is* that bad.

    As a girl, I feel like that horrible squealing is forever tarnishing the good name of my gender.

  2. Anonymous  

    mm sorority pledges ripe for the fucking

  3. a little clueless  

    Walking outside in the cold with all the screaming made me feel like I was in Dante's Inferno...

  4. what's that?  

    poopin' in Butler?

  5. politically inclined  

    I maintain that I distinctly heard some of them chanting about egyptian freedom.

  6. Random guy  

    It really isn't that bad. It's once a semester and I guess it means a lot to these girls. Haters gon' hate.

  7. NYPD

    26th Precinct
    520 West 126th Street, New York, NY, 10027
    (212) 678-1311

  8. dude Bwog  

    stop telling us that things aren't that bad and we shouldn't complain about them. that's what we DO. whining keeps us warm through the cold winter months

  9. Anonymous  

    I'm sure NYPD GIVES A FUCK about Columbia students whining about noise. "Yeah, we'll send a car, lights and sirens...as soon as we're done dealing with REAL CRIME, YOU COLLEGE DICKHEADS."

    Get over it. Besides, they're hot.

  10. Actually

    "Rush" [recruitment] is not in full swing. It was all weekend and ended tonight, when each sorority gets a group of new members.

  11. why are they not exticnt  


  12. harmony hunter  

    hey guys, thinking of rushing a frat. which one should i go for?

  13. bout time  

    someone whipped out the grenade whistle

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