While some Nytimes readers are quick to grab the crossword or The Ethicist, the sentimental softies among us reach for the Sunday Styles section and open straight to our weekly guilty pleasure, “Modern Love.” Tackling everything from “when your father google-stalks your boyfriends” to “my husband is now my wife,” the columns chronicle that crazy little thing called love. Cynics may roll their eyes, but Modern Love has an insane cult following—probably overlapping with the gazillion rom-com lovin’ ladies who devoured Eat, Pray, Love in one sitting. The column has snowballed into nine book deals and even a movie filmed in Morningside.
Given all the hoopla over Modern Love, it’s pretty exciting that today’s tale, “Bitten in the Virtual Zoo,” was written by one of our very own, senior Terry Tom Brown. A lab assistant at the Museum of Natural History, Terry marvels at animals’ remarkable gestures of interest to win their mates. “In humans, it’s the opposite,” he writes. “Why can’t we get enough of people who don’t give us enough?”
6 Comments
@Anonymous i miss randy cohen so much. like don’t even kid here.
But congrats Terry! I really liked your piece!
@What is love? baby don’t hurt me / don’t hurt me / no more…
@Re: the tag Isn’t a good idea for guys to read “Eat, Pray, Love” on planes? They can get potential dates or friends.
@Anonymous Everything about this post+comments is so cute.
@love in modern form Um okay first of all, some people believe in love. but do others? if you are bespectacled like dave macklovitch and so cool and stuff, then do you believe in love? cuz i dont kno if u wud be distant n stuff if u are so successful and tall and artistic. u best tell me. i kno some of his lyrics might touch on themes like love, but what is love really? some might try and use their book knowledge to answer this. but in reality it all comes down to ur relations with other people. look them in the eye and what do u feel sincerely? is it love? i really think there is abstraction in themes like love. do you like what u love or do you love what u like? or can you dislike what you love? instead, can you like what you do not love?
my heart is it really part of my brain? these questions are really pertinent. because if i think with my heart then it would imply something different than the brain.. ugh why are things so complicated. its like sitting in a core class and u have a book in front of u and the teacher asks something and u just stumped. why does it happen…….if u cud inform the world, i would appreciate.
what is love really? some call it amour, others love, others amor. some might call it two of those three or even all three. some might not. does love differ with cultures? or is it all an invention? chemistry might possibly play a role, who do you kid. but what is it all at heart?
as for modern love, we can begin evaluating the question by looking at modernity. have we even reached it? you can say eat pray love, but i say pray tell. i honestly wish somebody cud explain modernity as a precondition for our current existence. otherwise the whole issue of modern love is empty like a hole. it becomes a hole issue. now maybe that is slightly inaccurate, but who are you to judge? we live in an age when things are not as concrete. ur beloved truths are others’ lies. this is basically the case.
now love, undefinable, modernity, inexplicable. is that what we settle with? i have a little dialogue here…a student and a love professor:
L: Hey what is love?
S: It is a mystery that lies inside.
L: Like a stomach?
S: No, but just as essential.
L: Does it stay inside?
S: It is expressed, sometimes repressed.
L: Sounds quite unlike a stomach.
S: It transcends it.
L: So it is invisible?
S: My love can be visible. If i see her, I love her because i see her.
L: But what about when you do not see her?
S: Oh wow, love must be a phantasm.
L: You are on the money there. But surely a phantasm in a chimera of the brain?
S: Hmm, I would say.
L: So then love is an invention of humanity.
S: Sounds quite right.
L: So it is unnatural.
S: Probably.
L: But aren’t umbrellas also inventions of humanity?
S: For sure.
L: But they are not unnatural?
S: Not quite. I wouldn’t say natural either.
L: Are they necessary?
S: At times, u depend on them.
L: So love is a human invention that lies somewhere between the natural and unnatural, and u need it at times like nothing else. It is an inner principle that allows you to overcome the rain of negative emotions.
S: Sounds like a working definition.
L: Good my friend.
S: Yeah..
L: I agree.
S: Bye?
L: Yeah I’d say.
S: You are amazing, I learned a lot.
L: I know. Thanks again. Bye.
S: Thanks, I am busy.
L: But you are not alone.
S: Good point.
L: It’s not a good point, it’s what u wish.
S: Really.
@Anonymous It’s okay, I have a midterm tomorrow too.