Apr

25

Senior Wisdom: Rami Levi

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To close out the day, Bwog presents Rami Levi. Nominate wise seniors by going here
Name, Hometown, School, Major: Rami Levi (Ramson Van Der Levi IV), Teaneck, NJ, Anthropology Major/History Concentration

Claim to Fame: When Chowdah (Columbia sketch comedy!) opened for Bob Saget my Sophomore year, he told me during his standup act that I should take body shots of Jager off his daughter, I made hottt videos in the stacks and in my room that got on the internet, former Knicks Center Ronnie Turiaf repeatedly and angrily yelled my name at me on college walk, and I have a twin sister at Barnard…that’s gotta count for something right? (like tickets to hear Obama- wassuuppp!). Also, I’ve been the token Jew in your class.

Where are you going? Right Now- To Mo Willies to buy overpriced pomegranate Chobani. A little bit later-  to work in advertising  so I can justify overpriced food like Chobani. I also made a promise to myself that I’m not leaving the City till I see one of my favorite NY sports teams win a championship. In short, I’m not going anywhere for a while.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

  1. Even in your twenties, it’s probably not a good idea to get in a car with strangers (see war on fun).
  2. In 1857 a prophetess named Nongqawuse convinced the Xhosa of South Africa to kill their cattle. Sometimes I’ll say to myself – Can you literally name one goddam thing that you learned, off the top of your head. Like an actual, concrete fact? 7/10 times this is what I think of.
  3. At some point you will make an absolute fool of yourself. Embrace that fact. OWN that fact.

“Back in my day…” This was a legitimate decision …and people chose Campo.  A Meme was just something (and the only thing) I learned about in frontiers of science.

Justify Your existence in 30 words or less: My goal in life is to make you laugh.

Is the War on Fun over? Who won? Any war stories? One year my EC suite had a crazy paint party.  It was like holi, except with real paint… and it was in my suite. The next week we got an email from the Head of EC housing that we had a hearing for painting on the walls. My roommates decided it was best for me to pretend to be sick during the hearing given the fact that I had replied to her email after a long Saturday night out:  “We painted the walls, as we have done in previous years, with an easily washable paint. We will remove it immeeeddiattely. Thank you.” Spelling mistake included. I also got her name completely wrong in the email. Anyways we made a deal with housing and they gave us  a week to wash the paint off. Obviously, I messed up my one task and bought industrial paint remover. The acid started burning all the way to the concrete and the pathetic latex gloves we bought melted.

But I did gain a little respect for “the man” when they saved me from an interviewee from an ethnographic research project gone horribly wrong: a private detective wanted to kill me. He didn’t.  (although he did file a complaint with the attorney general of NY)

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? I love cheese.  Whenever I go to buy food I usually walk around for an hour thinking about buying everything but only leave with a pack of cheese sticks. I guess what I’m saying is, at the end of the day, I’d stick with cheese……but at the end of the night…well, that’s a different story….ayoooooo

Advice for the class of 2016:

  • Read the BWOG! It’ll keep you in the know on the happenings around campus (i.e. where the free food is) Also the comment section, minus the Barnard brouhaha, is wildly entertaining
  • Despite what professors may tell you in the beginning of class- culpa is incredibly accurate. Consult it!
  • Introduce yourself to who ever you can, whenever you can. People are always down to meet somebody else. Simply put, your peers here are worth knowing.  And giving the ol’ “hey whats up head nod” on the way to class goes a long way in creating community.
  • Sometimes you just have to accept that you go to a school where the library is the most happening place.
  • You will get it done. You are here because you can.
  • Join CBA.
  • If you ever get caught stealing a kosher brownie at Hewitt just say “Rami said it was cool”, then wink.

Regrets?

  • I guess I probably should have taken a class that included numbers at some point along the way.
  • I’ve walked passed too many event/lecture flyers without even thinking about attending
  • I also left the frontiers of science midterm early to catch the end of meaningless Jets game on the TV in the  Carman 5 hallway lounge. My GPA suggests that was ill-advised (I also regret giving frontiers so much face time in this wisdom).
  • Anyways you all are the greatest. I’ve had a blast and wish everyone the best!

 

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43 Comments

  1. Anonymous  

    RAMI IS HILAAARIOUSSSSS

  2. Anonymous  

    I really enjoyed this one! This guy is so funny! Hopefully someday a college comedy group will be opening for him and I hope he has seen the movie Funny People, the post made me think of it.

  3. Anonymous  

    one of my favorite people on campus. go JETS!

  4. Anonymous  

    "Also I've been the token Jew in your class." Doesn't token imply only one?

  5. Katy  

    Rami is the best.

    Also remember reading that meme article in Frontiers with you!! Who knew...

  6. IS IT REALLY YOU KATY???

    HOLY SHIT, KATIE BAKER IS ON BWOG! THE RUMORS ABOUT RAMI AND KATY MUST BE TRUE!!!

  7. jeff stern  

    You're the shit, Rami.

  8. Gay

    Rami is so fucking hot have my babies

  9. Anonymous  

    Rami is SOOO HOTT!

  10. Fan club

    Thank you BWOG for featuring Rami! Much deserved.

  11. chai  

    hahah i remember walking out of the elevator at carman 5 after frontiers to hear you yelling at the TV rami. good times, good times.

    cheers

  12. Anonymous  

    wow I wanna meet rami now

  13. Oh No

    New headline: Someone calls Rami Levi wise, friends never hear the end of it

    Rami is one of the funniest and most genuine people I have had the pleasure of knowing these past 4 years. He is going places and I've always had a huge not-so-secret crush on him. Which is weird, because I also consider him a younger brother and estranged son. I'm gonna go re-read Oedipus Rex.

    Much love, Ramalama!

  14. Anonymous  

    I hear his twin sister is HOT!

  15. Anonymous  

    You have officially made every bwog reader laugh- goal accomplished. Much love Ramson, don't leave us please.

  16. Shoshana

    RAMI YOU'RE AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  17. Anonymous

    I hear his twin sister eats off the subway floor.

  18. Kamel Jedidi  

    Way to build your brand.

    -THE CBA MARKETING TEAM

  19. zach  

    rami is an angel. this is my maxim.

  20. Anonymous  

    Talya or Rami?

  21. Working on Rami's cheese/oral sex logic...  

    I'd choose Rami at the end of the day but Talya at the end of the night...ayoooooo

  22. Anonymous  

    ur the best rami!! we'll miss u!!
    also best advice- the head nod thing totally works ;)

  23. Anonymous

    First time I met Rami:
    Me: "[Name of mutual friend] told me we'd be friends."
    Rami: "We already are!"

    If only finding awesome people were always this easy. Love you, wise one.

  24. Rex Ryan  

    Sorry kid, but I'll probably see jail-time for foot rape before you see a Super Bowl featuring the Jets. Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez's grandkid will probably be the halftime show. See ya in the stands next season you lovable fuckup

  25. Did you say 'SEX ADDICT?'  

    She sounds like my dream girl!

  26. Anonymous  

    Word on the street is you pooped on your sister in the bathtub at the age of 4

  27. 42  

    Wow! All these comment are really funny. I wish I could have a life talk with the person that wrote them...

  28. Anonymous  

    Does anyone know when phi beta kappa inductees are notified?

  29. Anonymous  

    Literally can't imagine college without this kid...love ya Rams!

  30. ivan  

    rami, I will never forget you... you were a great OL...

    also, i wish i had said that you said it was cool when i tried stealing one of the brownies... surprisingly enough i ended up getting into quite a big fight about discrimination...

    anyways, i love you and i hope to be able to hold you in my hands once more before you leave.

    xo

  31. I remember...  

    when i was a first year and Rami was my OL. He was amazing and I have always regretted not getting to know him better. Best of luck in your future endeavors!

  32. FYI  

    you can get a good deal for Fage when its on sale, $1/individual container.


    ps, you rock

  33. Anonymous

    THIS KID TRYS WAY TOO HARD...TOOL

  34. Anonymous  

    every time i hear his name i think of the grocery store chain in israel
    http://www.rami-levy.com/

  35. Carman 5

    Carman 5, represent!

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