To close out the day, Bwog presents Rami Levi. Nominate wise seniors by going here. 
Name, Hometown, School, Major: Rami Levi (Ramson Van Der Levi IV), Teaneck, NJ, Anthropology Major/History Concentration

Claim to Fame: When Chowdah (Columbia sketch comedy!) opened for Bob Saget my Sophomore year, he told me during his standup act that I should take body shots of Jager off his daughter, I made hottt videos in the stacks and in my room that got on the internet, former Knicks Center Ronnie Turiaf repeatedly and angrily yelled my name at me on college walk, and I have a twin sister at Barnard…that’s gotta count for something right? (like tickets to hear Obama- wassuuppp!). Also, I’ve been the token Jew in your class.

Where are you going? Right Now- To Mo Willies to buy overpriced pomegranate Chobani. A little bit later-  to work in advertising  so I can justify overpriced food like Chobani. I also made a promise to myself that I’m not leaving the City till I see one of my favorite NY sports teams win a championship. In short, I’m not going anywhere for a while.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. Even in your twenties, it’s probably not a good idea to get in a car with strangers (see war on fun).
2. In 1857 a prophetess named Nongqawuse convinced the Xhosa of South Africa to kill their cattle. Sometimes I’ll say to myself – Can you literally name one goddam thing that you learned, off the top of your head. Like an actual, concrete fact? 7/10 times this is what I think of.
3. At some point you will make an absolute fool of yourself. Embrace that fact. OWN that fact.

“Back in my day…” This was a legitimate decision …and people chose Campo.  A Meme was just something (and the only thing) I learned about in frontiers of science.

Justify Your existence in 30 words or less: My goal in life is to make you laugh.

Is the War on Fun over? Who won? Any war stories? One year my EC suite had a crazy paint party.  It was like holi, except with real paint… and it was in my suite. The next week we got an email from the Head of EC housing that we had a hearing for painting on the walls. My roommates decided it was best for me to pretend to be sick during the hearing given the fact that I had replied to her email after a long Saturday night out:  “We painted the walls, as we have done in previous years, with an easily washable paint. We will remove it immeeeddiattely. Thank you.” Spelling mistake included. I also got her name completely wrong in the email. Anyways we made a deal with housing and they gave us  a week to wash the paint off. Obviously, I messed up my one task and bought industrial paint remover. The acid started burning all the way to the concrete and the pathetic latex gloves we bought melted.

But I did gain a little respect for “the man” when they saved me from an interviewee from an ethnographic research project gone horribly wrong: a private detective wanted to kill me. He didn’t.  (although he did file a complaint with the attorney general of NY)

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? I love cheese.  Whenever I go to buy food I usually walk around for an hour thinking about buying everything but only leave with a pack of cheese sticks. I guess what I’m saying is, at the end of the day, I’d stick with cheese……but at the end of the night…well, that’s a different story….ayoooooo

Advice for the class of 2016:

• Read the BWOG! It’ll keep you in the know on the happenings around campus (i.e. where the free food is) Also the comment section, minus the Barnard brouhaha, is wildly entertaining
• Despite what professors may tell you in the beginning of class- culpa is incredibly accurate. Consult it!
• Introduce yourself to who ever you can, whenever you can. People are always down to meet somebody else. Simply put, your peers here are worth knowing.  And giving the ol’ “hey whats up head nod” on the way to class goes a long way in creating community.
• Sometimes you just have to accept that you go to a school where the library is the most happening place.
• You will get it done. You are here because you can.
• Join CBA.
• If you ever get caught stealing a kosher brownie at Hewitt just say “Rami said it was cool”, then wink.

Regrets?

• I guess I probably should have taken a class that included numbers at some point along the way.
• I’ve walked passed too many event/lecture flyers without even thinking about attending
• I also left the frontiers of science midterm early to catch the end of meaningless Jets game on the TV in the  Carman 5 hallway lounge. My GPA suggests that was ill-advised (I also regret giving frontiers so much face time in this wisdom).
• Anyways you all are the greatest. I’ve had a blast and wish everyone the best!