Claim to Fame? I’m another guy who successfully transferred to Columbia from a school in California, and once the admissions office used me for a photo shoot for the “Blue Book” but settled on a picture where all you can see is the back of my head. Also, I wrote sketches for Chowdah, and both XMAS!5 and the 118th Varsity Show.
Where are you going? Staying in NY to break the glass ceiling that has long kept Jews out of the entertainment industry.
Three things you learned at Columbia
“Back in my day…” “Moody” wasn’t just a descriptor for President Bollinger, she was our Dean. I once got to sit with Moody-Adams when I introduced her at Columbia fundraiser in California and was taken aback by how thoughtful, well-spoken and genuinely caring she was. Months later, she deliberately went out of her way on college walk to ask me how I was doing. I miss you, MiMoo.
Justify your existence in 30 words or less: James Franco was in my first Columbia class, and the night before the final, he recognized me in Butler and asked me what the format of our test was.
Is the War on Fun over? Who won? Any war stories? My junior year, when I lived on the 7th floor of Ruggles, my suitemate decided to organize an impromptu party between our suite and the one next door. Many drinks later, I was walking through the sweaty dance club that was once my kitchen when I suddenly noticed how wet and dirty the floor was. “It’s going to suck to clean this up,” I thought as I watched the floor increasingly get wetter and wetter. Smash-cut to me, swinging open the door to the bathroom. Turns out some kid broke our toilet and that the whole suite was flooding (and I mean, FLOODING) with water. Drunkenly bailing out toilet water at 1 am was not fun, but even after we flooded the two floors below us, I never heard anything about the incident.
Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? As my good friend, Giraldo (CC ’11)** said: “Cheese can suck my dick.”
**Giraldo may or may not be the fictional peer I created to keep this from being attributed to me on the Internet for eternity.
Advice for the class of 2016:
Any regrets? Bacchanal 2011, I got started way too early and ended up passing out in my bed, exhausted, before any of the artists even took the stage (I know – pretty pathetic…but really just funny). Other than that, I really don’t have any. Maybe it’s the fact that I just saw Titanic in 3D pretty recently, but as a transfer student, I really do feel like Jack Dawson winning the poker hand that suddenly changed his life forever. Admittedly, this is probably a terrible comparison as 1) Jack dies and 2) the ship sinks, but I do consistently pinch myself every time I step on this campus at night. I wouldn’t have changed the last few years for the world.