The sun sets on another semester

The official last day of classes was yesterday–despite the 5 make-up classes you’re taking this week because of Hurricane Sandy.  Take a deep breath and read the words of professors’ end-of-year nostalgia exasperation.

Herbert Sloan, Survey of American Civilization to the Civil War: “Unfortunately, the president during all of this is James Buchanan, who has the backbone of an eclair!”

Anthony Webster, Intro to Accounting and Finance, part 1: “Finance is the second best thing in life. Second only to sex.”

Anthony Webster, Intro to Accounting and Finance, part 2: “If you don’t think this equation is the most exciting thing outside of sex, then you shouldn’t go into finance.”

Gregory Mann, History of West Africa: “The exam will cover material you’ve learned since you quit caring about Ohio.”

Turkuler Isiksel, , : [on course evals] “Dont treat them like a Yelp survey, we are not your local Starbucks.”

Malvin Ruderman, Thermal and Statistical Physics: “This complicated problem is not worth solving, which you know if you tried the homework problem.”

Stephen Scott, Language & Politics: “I’m searching for an example to come up with, since I don’t speak ‘super-standard nerd’ language myself.”

Jian Yang, Neurobiology I: “Fill out the course evaluations. You can say bad things about me. I don’t care… I’m tenured.”

Edward Lincoln, Economic Development of Japan: “I hope you aren’t overwhelmed with how much we learned this semester…I guess we’ll find out with the final.”

Tipster Gavin M. sends us an adoring email about funny things said by Professor William Harris in Roman Social History throughout the semester:

• On comparing the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual to ancient conceptions of mental illness: “You realize that we’re in deep shit.”
• On the 2nd-century CE orator Aelius Aristides: “After a while you get fed up with this well-to-do landowner fussing about his guts.”
• “What is there to say about old age except misery?” …says the septuagenarian.
• On a mural from Pompeii: “The bridegroom seems to be a guy with no chin, and the bride seems correspondingly miserable.”
• On Juvenal’s sixth (misogynistic) satire: “629 rancorous lines leading to the conclusion that it’s better to take a young boy to bed than any woman. I strongly recommend you to take a strong drink and read the whole thing.”
• On ancient medical writers: “I was kept waiting by a doctor for 50 minutes this afternoon, and Galen never kept me waiting at all.”
• On historical positivism: “It has an attractive virginal purity to it, but one tends to go beyond virginity.”
• On Allan Bloom: “That egregious personality!”
• Oh, and: “Pliny really is a tight-ass, I must say.”

 Amen.

Where Bwog wishes we were via Shutterstock