Max Caffe’s Hot Chocolate

Bwog is bringing back its infamous feature 2girls1snack, in which we reference shock porn that was made when ’17ers were like 11 years old, and also review snacks around MoHi. This week, we sent Elizabeth Self and Lorna Hale to fill us in on our hot chocolate options.

Both of your taste-testers, being from the South, found this week to be a little chilly. Of course, the first thing one reaches for in such situations is a mug of hot chocolate, right? So, we decided to prepare you for the onslaught of winter by scoping out the best hot cocoa joints around campus, and to prepare ourselves by adding an extra, cocoa-flavored layer of blubber to our own bodies. (Note: Our original plan was to assign points based on heat at time of delivery, foam, milky flavor, chocolate flavor, and sweetness to help you decide based on your own preferences, but the rubric ended up being ignored in the end.)

Nussbaum & Wu: $2.12 5/5

Our initial experience at Nussbaum & Wu really ticked us off. Apparently our order for a single small cup of hot chocolate was lost, and we had to wait 10 minutes for it. However, the drink itself soon cheered us up again, though, winning not only the Cheapest Drink of the Day, but also the Best Integrated Milk and Chocolate Flavors award, having no sneaky powder in the bottom nor grainy texture. It was just warm and had enough foam that we got some in every sip. Definitely the best surprise of the day.

Hungarian Pastry Shop: $3.10 4.5/5

The crowded little Hungarian Pastry Shop initially stamped our memories by winning the award for the Most Tempting Dessert Case, but the hot chocolate was equally memorable. One author would like it to be noted that the hot chocolate would have been even better had the other taster not consumed all the whipped cream, which was an outstanding and unique feature in this competition, off the top of the drink. The drink wasn’t really sweet, it seemed, and had more of a pronounced dark chocolate flavor as well as a rich texture. We almost felt like grownups drinking this bitter beverage in the mellow, aspiring-writer-esque cafe. However, when we got heart palpitations from all the sugar hiding in the bottom, we decided this one didn’t quite deserve a 5/5.

Max Caffe: $3.25 + tax 3.5/5

A quick Google search for hot chocolate around the Columbia campus turned up Max Caffe. A quick look around the inside revealed that we were the only ones not drinking. Apparently this place is not exactly the kind into which one pops for a quick cup. However, if your parents happen to be around to buy you a nice meal in a swaggy sort of joint, and you happen to be craving some hot chocolate, you should note: theirs was rich, but not very sweet, with a heavenly foam on top. It was almost chalky while being neither thick nor watery.We would have preferred that more sugar had been added, but the fact that it had a nice milky flavor was appreciated. In way of customer service, our waiter tried to take himself a $2 tip out of our order, but the drink itself was reasonably pleasant. Also, the cup it came in was very artsy, if you’re into that.

Artopolis Expresso: $2.50 4/5

The service here was quick and the cost was among the lowest, but we would hardly say that we got our money’s worth. While the cocoa fulfilled its initial duties of being hot and

What the Booth has to offer

smelling nice, the foam on top was light, and the thin chocolate flavor was all hiding out in the bottom. This place wins the award for the Most Boring Hot Chocolate.

Ferris Booth Commons:  free with swipe

So, when in a pinch, there’s a hot chocolate machine in the Ferris Booth Commons dining hall. We heard that it gave out coffee, though, so try at your own risk.

Tune in next week for when the vulgar, funny one writes the article.